Darkness cannot exist without the absence of light.

You see, to grow up in Gary is to grow up in the shadows of Chicago.

Without light to grow the poor souls planted there, they would try to take whatever shone by any means necessary.

Being small even for a child and having an inherent glow in me meant I was easy prey for the most common of residents in Gary, people who let the darkness of the city consume them long ago, leeches whose only purpose these days were to consume.

My first day realizing this was my first day of high school. I did well in all my classes and my parents wanted the best for me so they let me commute to the nicer areas of the county via train.

During the commute to the school, I felt lighter the further we got away from Gary. I could just focus on mentally preparing for school. The way back home was a completely different story.

Every stop was a shift in atmosphere. Anyone with a pep in their step got off the train one by one. By the time we were nearing mine, I was the only one who looked like the world hadn’t destroyed them. Several of them recognized the same thing. They started smiling for the first time that whole trip.

It wasn’t the kind that invites, it’s the kind that you wear when you’re about to commit atrocities. They jumped me and took everything they could get their hands on. The only thing I had left was that smile. When they got off, an old man helped me up and said keep wearing that smile for me kid, it’s nice to see it in these parts. Give me a face to look forward to now that Norma is gone.

For Ed, I swore to never lose that smile. I’d smile whenever I saw him and I made sure to keep it. I’m glad he liked it because those other guys certainly didn’t, it seemed to piss them off further, every day more guys would join to see if they could be the one to break me. They took everything but the clothes on my back each time but they could never take my pride.

Whatever they threw at me I persisted. One day, Ed missed the train. I kept smiling for his sake until I heard the news. Those bastards followed him home and forced him to rejoin Norma the wrong way. I knew they did it to break me but for Ed, I couldn’t. 

If I stopped smiling, his death would be for nothing, they would have won. I smiled with spite the next time but it made them give up. It made them know they couldn’t bring me down. This is why I keep smiling, this is why I try to bring the world up with me. This is why I came to OSW. To show those who tried to break me, I’ll continue to fight and win, lose, or draw, I’ll do it with a smile.

For Ed.