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ALL I WANT FOR CHRISTMAS
EPISODE #253
DECEMBER 6TH 2021

 

 

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“FROM THE GRAVE”
FEATURING
SIGIL & VOYNICH

Click.

Static covers the screen as a Play ► symbol appears in the bottom right-hand corner.

Zap.

A blue portal opens inside a darkened area of The Slaughterhouse. It’s been two weeks since he was last here at Ring King, but Sigil arrives in the depths of our beloved arena once again.

He steps through and arrives beside the grave of Voynich – only it isn’t how he left it.

In a panic, he turns around to see a shovel handle slam into his face.

It’s Voynich!

The Best Kept Secret was dug up last week by The Terrors! He stumbles Sigil back and tackles him to the ground, delivering hammer blow after hammer blow, the shovel handle still in his hand.

The Collector somehow manages to kick him off overhead and rolls away.

He gets back to his feet, but Voynich runs towards him, driving the handle straight into his mid-section. Blood spurts out as The Best Kept Secret drives him backwards towards a wall, pinning him against it.

“This is never gonna end, is it?” Sigil says, coughing up blood inside his mask.

“You know what you’ve done,” Voynich reminds him whilst twisting the handle. Sigil groans in agony as he does. “Malice, Wynona, Darby Sorrow – me, the list of people you’ve killed goes on.”

The Collector angrily pulls himself up the shovel handle, grunting and squealing as he does, so that he’s mask to face with his enemy.

“All I want,” he stammers, speaking softly. “All I want…

All I want for Christmas is for you to fucking die,” Voynich interrupts with a growl. “So fucking die.”

Sigil chuckles slightly before doing as Voynich wanted. The Best Kept Secret tosses him down onto the ground like trash and steps away, taking a deep breath.

“It felt good, didn’t it?” A voice says from the shadows.

It’s The Endless. He steps forward, smirking.

“Now, just imagine how that’ll feel when you know he won’t be coming back.”

Voynich looks over his shoulder, an evil smirk crossing his scrunched-up face.

Cut.

 

 

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“DOUBLING DOWN”
FEATURING
SIMON & PYRE

In the middle of a large prestigious looking building, Pyre and Simon sit on a row of chairs. They’re both dressed in suits and look very formal, as they await to be called inside a room with two large double wooden doors.

“I don’t want to do this,” Pyre says quietly.

Simon just smiles and shakes his head.

“Listen my dear,” he says calmly. “Your little cronies won’t work for me, and I don’t think your capable of making them. Now, that’s not a knock on your persuasive abilities, I just don’t think they’re going to go for it.”

She rolls her eyes.

“No, you listen fuckhead,” she says abruptly, shortly realizing her tone and adjusting. “This is just gonna piss em off.”

“Perhaps,” he muses. “But whether they like it or not, they’re going to work for me. I don’t care if they do it angrily or do it with a smile – I want them in my charge and this is the best way forward.”

Suddenly the large wooden double doors open and out steps a woman with a clipboard.

Simon and Pamela?” She asks.

They both stand, preparing to follow her in with fake smiles. They stop before they do, Simon turning to Pyre.

“If you don’t do as I decide, I will destroy you,” he whispers through a fake smile. “Now, let’s double down, shall we?”

Pyre reluctantly nods and they both enter the room.

Cut.

 

 

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THE OPENER
BULLROPE MATCH
ISRAEL GRIMWOLF vs. PHINEAS MOODY

Monster clashes against Demon here tonight all with a leather strap in the middle as The Horror of the Deep goes to war against Carnevil itself.The bell sounds as Grimwolf rushes forward, trying for an early TKO with the roaring elbow but Moody uses the rope to wrap the limb, pulling Grimwolf close into the BEARDED LADY’S KISS! Israel staggers back dazed as Moody uses the distraction to slap his hand on the first turnbuckle.

He manages to slap his hands on the second but barely steps away from the second before he’s stopped by the superior weight of Grimwolf. Moody tries to power away but the Horror is unnaturally strong in his own right as he pulls Moody back, KEEHAULED TO THE BACK OF THE HEAD! Phineas is now the one dazed but Grimwolf isn’t done as he rears back that right hand.

DEAD MANS…MOODY VANISHES! He can’t go far with that strap latched to his wrist but he re-appears behind Grimwolf, strap wrapping around Grimwolf’s neck as he tries to spin him around, DAZZLING, EXCITING…MANS CHEST! Grimwolf hits the heart punch out of nowhere as Phineas might be out.

Grimwolf, pulling Phineas along, slaps the first turnbuckle, then the second, and then the third, not noticing Moody slapping them on the sly as he’s stopped mere inches from the final turnbuckle, pulled in from behind into the DAZZLING EXCITING EXTRAORDINARY MISTER MOODY! The Bullhammer rattles Grimwolf’s eyes into the back of his head before he leaps forward, slapping the final turnbuckle and stealing the victory out from underneath Grimwolf!

Carnevil picks up the victory here in this battle of the big bads as that deadly Bullhammer gains him the win once more.

 

WINNER: PHINEAS MOODY

 

 

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“EXPOSÉ II”
FEATURING
TENCHU & CALLIHAN

Previously.

“I gave you ample warning not to go down this path.”

Tenchu steps closer, his eyes glowing with anger as he pulls his sword from the door.

“You will not survive the journey.”

Tenchu raises the blade, preparing to finish what he started inside the Slaughterhouse…and with a clang, it manages to slice right through the doorknob, breaking it clean off the office door.

Callihan, however, just narrowly escapes the blade, still clinging onto his laptop as he steps back in a panic.

“I am not gonna let you kill me again, Tenchu. I don’t know what you did, or how I survived…but I’m not going through it again.”

With that, Callihan musters up a gallon of courage…and charges at the Metal Shadow, using the force and momentum to send both of them barreling through with a loud thud before Tenchu has a chance to strike again!

Callihan finds himself rolling across the floor, his laptop slipping out of his arms and landing just inches away.

Tenchu returns to his feet, immediately noticing the laptop…and before the journalist can retrieve it, Tenchu sends his blade a-swingin’ once more, this time demolishing the laptop!

“Son of a–”

Callihan opts not to finish his remark as he sees the Metal Shadow turn his attention back to him once more.

Instead, he simply makes a run for the nearest elevator, narrowly managing to get in and have the door close just as the blade strikes against the outside.

With Tenchu seemingly settled on destroying the evidence, the Metal Shadow flees in another direction as we focus on a distraught Callihan, smacking his head in frustration.

“Shit, shit, shit, what am I supposed to do now?”

The journalist takes a moment to think as the elevator makes its descent to the ground floor before finally having a light bulb go off in his brain, checking his phone…and sighing in relief at what he sees.

A folder containing his notes and research, safely backed up online.

“Thank fuck for cloud storage.”

Callihan rests his head on the back wall of the elevator, letting out a slight chuckle at his fortune as the elevator arrives at its destination.

A look of anxiety washes over his face as the door opens…but, to his delight, Tenchu is not waiting for him on the other side.

Callihan is safe, for now…but he knows where he’ll find the assassin waiting for him.

The Slaughterhouse.

Cut.

 

 

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“BLASPHEMOUS II”
FEATURING
SIR RENAULT & PHINEAS MOODY

Distraught over what he saw in his Bible the previous week, Sir Renault walks into an empty church and kneels at the alter.

“Father, if you are still out there hear my prayer. I face a horrible evil that mocks and blasphemes you. He seeks to break my faith in Your eventual return.”

Laughter

Sir Renault looks around for the source that seems to be echoing through the cathedral. He turns back to see the face of Jesus on the cross turn into the visage of the twisted Circus Ringleader.

“And for the first act tonight, taking centre stage, The Death-Defying Apostles!” Phineas announces with a twisted glee

Images of the Apostles of Jesus begin running around on the walls of the church in comedic fashion, slipping up as the Roman soldiers catch and kill them.

Sir Renault looks on with both anger and horror as he watches the twisted circus act play out in front of him.

“And for our next act, look to the skies as we see the Angel’s Dance!”

Sir Renault looks up as he sees a dance between Angels and Demons take place with the Demon’s ripping the wings off of the Angels.

“Looks like Angel Wings for dinner tonight!” Phineas laughs with glee.

“And for our final act, we will have to wait and see. It’ll be the greatest act the world has ever seen! At Red Snow we will see the breaking of the Crusader!” Phineas says as all returns to normal in the church.

“Without a doubt, Moody.” Sir Renault declares.

Off in the distance of the church we see a shadowy figure lurking.

As Sir Renault gets up and walks out of the building, he looks over in the direction as if aware of the extra presence but sees nothing.

Cut

 

 

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THE MID-CARD
TRIOS MATCH
VOYNICH, THE SANDMAN & MORDECAI vs. SIGIL, SEESAW & CXDY

Which of these trios will survive this nightmarish playdate!?

The Sandman burns a hole through the man who’s already in a waking nightmare, CXDY. GOOZLE – TO SAND!? DENIED! CXDY fights off The Dream Demon’s chokeslam; slaps, chops, roundhouse, dropkick – PERFECT RUSH! Sandman still stands tall, but CXDY is BIG IN JAPAN; the lariat puts the spectre down! ONE… TWO… BENCH-PRESS KICKOUT!

Sigil tags himself in, leaving CXDY to stand next to his tormentor, SeeSaw, on the apron. The Collector sinks into a calf-crusher – ON WOUNDED LEGS! Sandman drags them both towards his corner, hand outstretched… MORDECAI TAGS IN! Sigil leaps into the FINITE roundhouse kick, but The Gatekeeper of Dreams gives him a REALITY CHECK European uppercut! ONE… TWO… SHOULDER UP!

Before he can capitalise, however – WOOSH! Sigil COSMIC LEAPS to safety on the outside—GORE, SPINEBUSTER! SeeSaw blindsides Mordecai with the SUPERFINE TURBINE BLAST! Mr. Make Believe—now the legal man—covers him. ONE… TWO… KICKOUT! SeeSaw rolls Mordecai over. He grabs his arms and stomps the small of his back – STRETCH ARMSTRONG! Mordecai is in trouble…

HAMMERSTONE! A blazing Voynich intervenes with a Superman punch! SeeSaw slumps against the ropes, which push him back into Best Kept Secret – MONOLITH brainbuster! Voynich hauls him up… THE EIGHTH WONDER!? NO! SeeSaw catches him with THE BIG WHEEL torture rack into the cutter! Sandman and Mordecai make the save… YOUR FORETOLD DESTINY 540° roundhouse by CXDY! PLANESWALKER dropkick by Sigil! SeeSaw covers Voynich – ONE… TWO… THREE!

Sigil, SeeSaw & CXDY come out of playtime unscathed!

 

WINNERS: SIGIL, SEESAW & CXDY

 

 

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“DEAD MAN’S SECRETS”
FEATURING
CAEL GABLE

Yesterday. Somewhere Else.

We’re on a very mystical island in the middle of no-where. We’ve been here before. A thick fog makes it almost impossible to make out from the ocean. Only an experienced traveller would know the route.

We follow Cael Gable as he walks towards a small cave opening. As he approaches, it illuminates by torchlight.

Once inside the cave, torches light up the sides, allowing him entry to a man who sits before a fire inside, covered in a wretched looking robe. His skin is leathery and aged, his hands bony and frail. He has no eyes but sees everything.

“I knew you’d be back,” Dead Man’s Fingers states calmly.

“Everything I saw came true,” Gable admits whilst taking a seat before him.

Flashback.

There’s screaming, splashing and drowning. Gable struggles against his grip, wanting desperately to escape what he’s seeing, but Dead won’t let go.

Then it stops.

They see Zero & Pyre.

The Hacker is on his knees, grabbing at his head, screaming in agony. His face is wretched and warped.

Pyre meanwhile is surrounded by members of the Old School Wrestling roster – their faces obscured so that we can’t see them. They’re shouting at her, bellowing in fact. Her hands begin raging with fire, before an explosion occurs, wiping our vision out entirely.

The Present.

“I now know what I first saw,” he says with a bowed head. “I should’ve believed you.”

There’s a sigh from Dead Man Fingers, mixed with a little growling ‘mm’.

“I tried to tell you, but you wouldn’t listen. Take my hand,” he demands. “Come closer.”

Gable reaches out.

DMF pulls him in and whispers something in his ear. Cael’s eyes widen for a moment as he takes the information in – we don’t hear anything, except the final words.

The Nekken is here,” he says loudly. “Run.

The sound of men running through the tunnels echoes throughout the cave as DMF stands up and points Gable towards a secret exit, allowing him access to it.

“Run,” he says again. “Take what I’ve told you and finish this. It can only be you, Cael Gable.”

The Olympian nods, slipping through the exit.

Cut.

 

 

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“WHEN YOU CAN’T DIE”
FEATURING
JESSIE WILLIAMS, KAINE KNIGHTLORD & ASH WILLIAMS

In a hospital near The Slaughterhouse, we see Jessie Williams bedridden and hooked to a few machines, one to read his vitals, another giving him that consistent IV drip.

He came back to life shortly after Kaine’s attack but the way it happened has left him weak.

A slight knock on the door warns Jessie that a hospital official is coming in.

It’s simply an orderly bringing him a meal.

The orderly tries some small talk.

“Hello Mr. Williams, how are you today?”

Jessie tries to reply but words come out very feebly.

“I could be better.”

The orderly nods and responds.

“Do you want to be?”

Jessie look confused but answers.

“Yes of course.”

The orderly looks up from the meal cart for the first time and locks eyes with Jessie.

Jessie’s eyes grow wide open!

It’s Kaine Knightlord!

“I can make you.”

Kaine smiles and lunges at Jessie!

Jessie tries to pull out the needles from the IV drip but its no use as Kaine pins down the arm unattached to the machine.

Kaine shakes his head and speaks.

“Why are you fighting this? You said you wanted to be better.”

Jessie speaks with the most strength he’s had today.

“Yeah, I said better. You’re not better than me.”

Jessie spits in Kaine’s face!

Kaine wipes it off, grimaces, and speaks up.

“Oh, that’s it. No more talking. It’s time for you to join your sister in your new family.”

He kneels and bites Jessie’s neck again, not as an attack like before but he’s siring him this time!

Is Jessie Williams about to become a vampire!?

The door opens.

It’s Ash who isn’t in the room all the way yet so he’s blind to what’s happening at first. He speaks apologetically.

“Sorry, it took so long. There was a long line downstairs at Starbucks.”

Ash finally sees what’s happening and drops the coffee he got for Jessie.

“Oh no, you son of a bitch, You already got my daughter, not my son.”

Ash charges at Kaine and levels him with a right hand.

Kaine drops to a knee and Ash yanks his head off of Jessie!

He’s stopped mid-sire and Jessie is still human!

Ash has Kaine by the hair and is seething at him.

He’s staring him down with the wrath only a parent can have. Ash speaks.

“Get the fuck out of here. If it wasn’t for the Endless, I’d have already blown your head off. Now leave before I change my mind.”

Kaine looks like he’s about to attack but he second guesses it, sighs, and speaks.

“Fine, you’ve won this one, you can keep your favorite. Mine is better anyway.”

Kaine storms off and Ash tends to his son.

Cut.

 

 

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THE MID-CARD
TABLES MATCH
CAEL GABLE vs. HOLLYWOOD LUKE STORM

Hollywood glitter meets Olympic gold but who is getting wood in this bout?

The bell tolls and Gable explodes….GOLD RUSH!!!! He buckled Hollywood in half! The Olympian wastes no time, setting up a table. The gold medallist lifts Storm, suplex through the table…NO! Storm slips out…DOWNFALL!!!

Hollywood grabs a table, leaning it against a turnbuckle. He lifts Gable and whips him towards the wood, charging behind him. But the Olympian runs up the table back flips over Storm. Hollywood reacts…LIGHTNING STRIKE!!!! MISSES!! Gable ducks under and counters with TEN KARAT!!!

Those ten consecutive German suplexes have Hollywood rattled but Gable still holds on. He’s looking for an 11th suplex…this one through a table!!!! Mule kick!!! Storm escapes….GALE FORCE!!!! Hollywood lifts Gable onto the table and hits the top turnbuckle. Double finger point to the sky…FLYING ELBOW DROP!!! STRAIGHT THROUGH THE TABLE!!! BUT GABLE HAD ROLLED OFF!

Luke is in a bad way, he gets to his feet, wiping off bits of wood….PUGHPLEX!!! Gable just made his night a whole lot worse! The Olympian sets up another table. He wants this one. But Hollywood has recovered…LIGHTNING STRIKE-COUNTERED!!! Storm is sent to the corner. He charges…SPINNING SPINEBUSTER!!! Gable puts Hollywood through a table!!!

Cael Gable is sure to impress The Academy with this performance!

Just then, the lights flash and The Nekken appears on the entrance ramp! Cael quickly dives out of the ring and hops over the barricade, running away from his foe as quickly as he possibly can.

 

WINNER: CAEL GABLE

 

 

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“BASTILUM TRIAL, I”
FEATURING
DARKLORD, BANZAN, & LEIF HELVIG

Uh oh, this isn’t going to end well.

Backstage, we find a confrontation is in progress.

On one side, we have Leif Helvig, Hati and Skoll at his side. He has his axe at the ready.

On the other side, we find Banzan, holding a brilliantly sharp katana.

“I have grown tired of being taken advantage of.” Banzan says. “We will finish this tonight.”

“You’ve purchased death, Banzan.” Helvig responds casually. “I will gladly provide it.”

They charge in at one another, but before they can even levy a strike, the whole world goes to shit.

Both behemoths fly up in the air suddenly, hitting the ceiling enough to break concrete. Helvig’s wolves land on Leif, making for a heap of wolves.

They try to stand up, but find that something very odd has happened. The world has turned upside down. They are able to stand on the ceiling like they would the floor.

But to make things worse, they look like they are moving through molasses.

“Do you feel that?” A voice calls.

Darklord.

The monster steps into the room, his mighty Warhammer at his side. He’s moving just fine.

“What you feel is a Carthian gravity generator, pulled from the remains of my ship. You find it cumbersome to move, odd to orient yourselves to another way of existence.”

He pauses as Banzan and Helvig get to their feet. The wolves are unable to adjust, and are howling their confusion.

“This is how I live every day on this putrid rock.” Darklord continues. “You are lucky I did not flood the room with the air I breathe. You would not survive.”

He hoists his hammer.

“Yet you will not survive the Bastilum Trial, either way. Earth’s greatest warriors can surely adjust, can you not?”

He charges in with his Warhammer, taking a fully charged swing at Banzan, who ducks.

Well, tries to duck.

The hammer hits Banzan square in the chest, sending the Mountain flying into the wall beyond him.

Helvig charges in with his axe, swinging straight for Darklord’s head. The God King easily dodges, swinging into the back of Helvig with his Warhammer.

With both of his foes down, Darklord presses something on his arm, and the gravity shifts back to normal. Banzan, Helvig, and the wolves drop to the ground with a thud, while Darklord gracefully twists to land on his feet.

As Hati and Skoll step up to protect Helvig, Darklord steps past them to Banzan. He grabs the monk by the neck, dragging him out of the room like a sack of potatoes.

What the hell does Darklord have planned for Banzan?

 

 

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“IN YOUR EAR”
FEATURING
SANCTUS BELLATOR & THE IMPALER

“Kill. Maim. Repeat.”

“Kill. Maim. Repeat”

“Kill. Maim. Repeat”

These words echo off walls of pure darkness. We find ourselves staring down Sanctus Bellator, the Holy Warrior. He’s slumped in a circle of moving, writhing shadows. He grits his teeth, slowly staggering to his feet as the shadows circle around him.

“Kill. Maim. Repeat”

The voice grows louder, Sanctus watching in horror and fury as The Impaler steps out of the wall of black! He smirks, holding his arms outward.

“Come on, Sanctus. I can feel the fire in your soul, the animosity waiting to be unleashed. You’re one of us now, another me just waiting to join the family tree! You can’t escape, brother.” Impaler lets out a venomous chuckle as he slumps forward towards Sanctus.

“GET OUT OF MY HEAD!” Bellator shrieks in return as he leaps at The Impaler! He lays into him with a flurry of blows, each one more vicious than the last! Impaler’s smile never leaves his face as every hit lands flush against his body!

“Yes! Yes! Do unto me what others would do unto you! The pain you can wrought is delicious, isn’t it? You want to hurt me, you want to kill me.”

“QUIET!” Sanctus punctuates this with a stomp to the face of a downed Impaler! The Legion chuckles, lulling back into an unconscious state.

But then the darkness fades to the dingy lights of the Slaughterhouse’s backstage.

And Sanctus looks around him in disgust as the illusion dissipates, revealing multiple staff and innocents, all of them left bleeding and bloodied on the floor. Sanctus grabs his head, falling to a knee as he looks upon what’s he’s done.

“Look at what you’ve done, Sanctus. Look upon it… and repeat.”

The voice of The Impaler penetrates Sanctus’ head, the Holy Warrior rocking back and forth as the scene fades out.

Cut.

 

 

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THE MID-CARD
TAG TEAM MATCH
NIGEL ROYAL & CALLIHAN vs. TENCHU & ALBIE SHAW

Tensions are mounting in this tag team affair, as Nigel Royal and Callihan take on Tenchu and Albie Shaw!

The bell rings as Callihan and Shaw start things off, trading lefts and rights before the Guv’nor gets the upper hand by sending the journalist to the ropes and goes for a clothesline on the rebound…but Callihan dodges it, hitting a neckbreaker instead before looking for a tag from Royal!

NO! Nigel refuses to tag in, unwilling to deal with Shaw after the torture he’s been through! This gives Shaw an opening as he spins Callihan around, dropping him to the canvas before locking in a crossface, clasping his hands over the journalist’s mouth! KEEP QUIET, SO SAYETH THE GUV’NOR!

Royal finally decides to get involved, stomping at the head of Shaw to break the hold! Angry at what he views is HIS move being used, he sends Shaw to the corner where Tenchu gets the tag…but as Royal leaves the ring, he’s surprised with a blind tag by Callihan!

The journalist quickly rolls out of the ring, narrowly avoiding disaster as Royal gets knocked down by a high jumping knee from Tenchu! LETHAL BLADE FINDS ITS MARK! Tenchu glares at Callihan before hoisting Royal up for a spinning inverted double underhook facebuster! ODOWARA SENT! NIGEL ROYAL IS OUT COLD!

With Callihan still out at ringside, Tenchu and Albie Shaw pick up the victory via KO…but it’s clear the issue they have with their respective opponents is far from over!

 

WINNERS: TENCHU & ALBIE SHAW

 

 

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“DEAR BROTHER”
FEATURING
THE SANDMAN & MORDECAI

The fluttering of turning pages brings the scene to life as the rustling of paper flickers through the air. This all ends with the loud thunk of that very book landing on a table.

“Don’t you just love a good bedtime story, dear brother?”

The wretched voice of The Sandman fills the air and we are welcomed to the sight of The Dream Demon sitting at a table perusing a large tome. Glancing at the pages it is apparent that the pages are filled with different stories to fall asleep to. He chuckles, looking up to see Mordecai standing in the doorway of this room.

“You wanted to be found, didn’t you?” The guardian asks, frowning as he takes a single step inwards, approaching cautiously as Sandman continues to read the book.

“Oh? No, you misunderstand, Mordecai. I wanted to be found when I gave that man his wonderful little nightmare. But now? Well now I think this just proves that you and I are connected at the hip. Like I said before. Two sides of the same coin.”

“Until I send you back,” Moredecai replies, crossing his arms. He watched as Sandman stands up-

FLASH!

MORDECAI IS BEHIND SANDMAN! FALSE AWAKENING-

DARKNESS!

The sounds of wood breaking echo through the room as action goes on that we’re unable to see! The lights slowly flicker to life revealing Mordecai on one knee, the table where Sandman once sat broken into pieces, the book he was reading torn to shreds with pages floating through the air.

“Find a story to read, dear brother. For soon, your eternal rest will come.”

Sandman’s voice echoes in the room as Mordecai stands to his feet, left once again with Sandman escaping his grasp.

Cut.

 

 

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“LOVE”
FEATURING
CXDY

The scene opens on an oak panelled office. On the wall are certificates, and on a shelf in the background are a smattering of ‘thank you’ cards.

“Mr. Williams, are you sure you want to do this? The previous draft more than covers you,” asks a man sat behind a desk just in front of those cards.

“Yes,” comes CXDY’s reply, heavy and full of sadness.

“When I thought it was all those others who were stalking my family, I got mad,” he continues. “It drove me crazy. I didn’t sleep for days when I thought Knightlord was behind it. And the lack of sleep made everything harder. No. This time I do things logically.”

“But, sir…”

“There are no buts, Edmund. You are my lawyer and I am instructing you to update my will. If you don’t do so, I will take my request and my payment elsewhere.”

CXDY sighs.

“I have seen what that monster has done. Everyone who has set foot inside that fresh hell of his he calls the Toy Box has died. Nobody lives. And at Red Snow I could be added to that ever-expanding list. I’ll fight with everything to make sure I’m not…

“But?” interjects Edmund at the silence.

“But if this is the end for me I need to know that Sasha and Cody Jr. are safe. That would make it all worth it. I love them so much. So I need you to pick up that pen of yours and sign the document. I know what I need to do, and this is step one.”

“As you say, Mr. Williams.”

The lawyer signs the document, and hands it to CXDY who signs it too.

Cut.

 

 

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MID-CARD
NO DISQUALIFICATION
LEIF HELVIG vs. VIPER ROBERTS ©

The Head Snake has survived the very best of the best during his time as OSW Champion but he’s never quite faced a destroyer like the beast of slaughter. Will Roberts fall at the feet of the man who’s broken so many before or can Viper do what no one else has done and deliver the viking his first ever loss?The bell sounds as Helvig rushes forward, surprising Viper with a full force running elbow to the jaw that nearly breaks it. Roberts staggers back into the ropes, eyes glazed over as Leif is allready on him, wrapping the ropes around his neck with GLEIPNIR’S BOUND! Helvig is choking Roberts out and it’s all legal here.

Viper, flailing wildly, delivers an inadvertent thumb to the eye which blinds Helvig enough for him to deliver a deliberate low blow that breaks the rope choke hold. Roberts isn’t able to capitalize, trying to catch his breath instead and by the time he turns to Leif, a right hand is easily caught by Helvig who flips Viper up

VALKYRIE KALLAR INTO THE TURNBUCKLES! Helvig drives Roberts into the steel, the Head Snake slowly pulling himself as Helvig rushes forward, FRIG…SNAKE OIL! Helvig rushes right into that poison mist, slowing him down allowing Roberts to spike him into the mat with a snap ODE TO SNAKE DDT!

Roberts pulls Helvig up, looking to finish off the groggy Helvig with the Snake Bite but Helvig slips out, rolling back before nearly cutting Roberts in half with the FRIGORA! Helvig isn’t done, backing up as Roberts slowly gets to his feet before absolutely destroying the world champion with a second FRIGORA! Roberts is done as Helvig drops down for the ONE…TWO…THREE!!

The Beast of Slaughter continues his huge run, putting down the world champion with a pair of Frigora’s in a dominant display here.

 

WINNER: LEIF HELVIG

 

 

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“POINTER”
FEATURING
NIGEL ROYAL & ALBERT SHAW

Flash Forward

Hours After TerrorvisionNigel Royal is running, scrambling and falling in the mud. His eyes wide as he claws at the ground to scale a muddy bank in the darkness. A finger missing from each hand and both heavily bandaged makes for a difficult trek, but Royal eventually climbs the terrain.

When atop the hill, he ducks out of sight under an overpass, breathing heavily. Slowly, relief floods his face as he comes to the conclusion that he has lost his tail.

“All I want for Christmas, Nige… Is my son back.”

The voice is well known, coming from the shadows only too close to where Royal stands. Before he has a chance to react, Nigel Royal feels the metal guitar strings slip over his throat and tighten. Cutting into his neck, removing the opportunity to breathe.

Albert Shaw steps from the shadows, kicking Royal out from his hiding place while holding the other end of the garrote.

“So, asshole. I’ll ask once more. Where’s my fucking son?”

Royal looks at him defiantly, trying his best to smirk, but the fear in his eyes gives him away. Then, the lack of oxygen begins to catch up and Royal fades, his legs turning to jelly and struggling to hold him up. It is then that Shaw grabs his foe’s wrist, pulling the bandages off his hand to reveal the missing thumb.

“Which one is it going to be then?”

Royal shakes his head, the light draining from his eyes even as he does so.

“You’re so used to pointing the finger at others, striking your deals and being the one who gives the orders. Well I’m done taking orders from you, and I’ll be the one pointing the finger from now on.”

He grabs Royal by the index finger and twists it until he hears a snap and Royal’s mouth open to gargle as best he can a cry of agony.

“Okay… Okay…” Royal gasps.

Shaw smiles, releasing the hold on the garrote and allowing Royal to breathe. Royal collapses to the ground, but Shaw isn’t letting him go. He holds the broken finger and places his foot on Royal’s chest. Royal’s eyes plead as does his mouth.

“Chartwell Academy. That’s the name of the school. Just, no more. You’ve made your point, and you’ve got what you need.”

Albert relinquishes his foot on Royal’s chest, allowing Nigel to sit up. He kneels down, patting him on the cheek. A pat that soon turns to a slap. His hand still grasping Royal’s own.

“I’ll be the judge of when you’ve had enough, you fucking ass.”

With that, he closes the snips around Nigel Royal’s index finger, lopping it off as he had done his thumb. Then, pocketing the freshly cut finger, he leaves the bleeding and battered figure of Nigel Royal screaming in the darkness behind him.

Cut.

 

 

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“FEAR NOT”
FEATURING
HOLLYWOOD LUKE STORM & DEATHNOTE

Fear. When it grips you, one’s heart beats faster. Breathing becomes sharper and pupils dilate. All the physical responses that Luke Storm does not currently show.

He looks nonchalant as he swaggers his way through the backstage of the Slaughterhouse, sipping away at a cocktail without a care in the world.

A far cry away from the figure of Deathnote who appears seemingly from nowhere. He looks wary, cautious and a little unsettled. Both he and Storm stop in their tracks as they cross paths and the Shinigami eyes Storm with his head somewhat tilted in suspicion.

“I have been racking my brain, trying to answer the one single question that has consumed me.” He draws himself right up to Storm, looking as if to peer right into his soul through his eyes. “Why?”

Storm simply cracks into a cocky smirk and shrugs his shoulders slightly. He pulls the crumpled piece of paper from his pocket that Deathnote had given him last week, his own death note. By now, it is tattered and creased, having been carelessly folded and stuffed discardingly into a pocket.

“Oh, this thing? Yeah, nice show but I really don’t care.”

Deathnote pulls his notebook out. He doesn’t need to turn the pages, for he has it memorized.

Lucas Newton…December 18th 2021.”

Storm chuckles at the recital, only angering Deathnote further.

“Why? Lucas Storm… Why does your own death not seem to scare you?”

Luke Storm doesn’t speak, he doesn’t answer. Instead, a very long and awkward silence befalls the air. Deathnote only breaks the silence as he thrusts the notebook into Storm’s chest. A frustrated growl escapes his lips.

“Why, Storm? You will care, I promise you that much.”

Deathnote sheathes his notebook and passes by, his confusion now turned to rage.

Cut.

 

 

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THE MAIN EVENT
TAG TEAM CHAMPIONSHIP MATCH
THE IMPALER & SANCTUS BELLATOR © vs. bMf ©

Impaler and Bellator stand in their corner, The Light Warrior looking worse for wear as he stares down the reigning, seemingly unbeatable tag team champs!

Zero starts things off for BMF as he closes in on Sanctus! The Holy Warrior holds his head in pain and takes a harsh haymaker for his inability to act! He lands in the turnbuckle and Impaler drops off! He’s letting Zero absolutely pummel Bellator!

ZERO REARS BACK! FIREWALL! BIONIC CLOTHESLINE TO A CORNERED BELLATOR!

Sanctus drops to his ass and receives a plethora of boots raining down upon him as Zero stomps a God Damned mudhole in The Templar! Zero peels him up by the mask, whipping him into the ropes and clocking him with a leaping knee! Bellator tries to get to his feet-

AND INTO ZERO’S ARMS! CPU DRIVER! BURNING HAMMER DROPS HIM!

A cocky smile spreads across Zero’s face as he gets to his feet and he turns Sanctus onto his back before placing a foot on his chest for the pin!

ONE!


TWO!


NO! SANCTUS GETS A SOULDER UP!

The Holy Warrior begins to crawl towards his turnbuckle as Impaler looks on with a smirk!

ZERO DRAGS BELLATOR BACK! HE HAULS HIM UP FOR ANOTHER CPU DRIVER!

Bellator is out like a light and Zero goes for the pin!

… Or not?

The Bionic Man stops in his tracks and we see his visor blue screen!

PUNK CITY KILLER! STUNNER TO THE REFREE?

Pyre shouts at Zero from the apron as he walks back towards her! She tries to ask just what he’s thinking-

WHEN A METAL HAND CLAMPS AROUND HER THROAT! ABSOLUTE ZERO! BIONIC CHOKESLAM PLACES PYRE BETWEEN THE RING ROPES AND PLANTS HER ON THE MAT!

Pyre grabs at her throat in shock as she gasps for air on the ground! Zero whips Pyre across the ring and catches her with a leaping elbow on the way back! He leaps onto his partner, attacking her against his will!

However, in the other corner of the ring Impaler has entered and he forces Bellator to his feet! Impaler reaches into his jacket and pulls out his hammer!

… Which he hands to Bellator?

Sanctus begs and pleads with The Impaler! He doesn’t want to use this!

BUT A BLACK MASS COVERS HIS FACE! BELLATOR CAN’T FIGHT THE IMPALER’S HOLD!

BALLPEEN HAMMER TO THE BASE OF ZERO’S SKULL! THE HACKER JUST GOT HIT WITH A FACTORY RESET AS ZERO FREEZES UP AND FALLS TO HIS SIDE! SANCTUS LAYS INTO HIM WITH A FLURRY OF BLOWS FROM THE HAMMER! HE’S OUT TO MAIM AGAINST HIS WILL!

In his fury however he forgets about Pyre who leaps up to her feet!

FIREY ROUNDHOUSE KICK TO THE BACK OF BELLATOR’S HEAD! THE HOLY WARRIOR IS OUT ON THE GROUND!

BUT HERE COMES IMPALER WITH THE ADAM SMASHER- NO! PYRE DUCKS THE LARIAT! SHE CATCHES HIM ON THE REBOUND WITH A MASSIVE FRANKENSTEINER THAT PLANTS HIM!

All the competitors are on the ground and no one looks to be moving and the referee is out too! The crowd looks on in shocked silence for a few moments before Impaler finally begins to get to his feet! He sees Pyre doing the same!

BLACK MIST! MIST TO THE EYES AND PYRE IS BLINDED! ADAM SMASHER LARIAT SENDS HER OVER THE ROPES!

Impaler pockets his hammer and drapes Bellator over Zero before going to rouse the referee! The official finally comes to and gets dragged to the pin!

ONE!

TWO!

THREE!

NEW CHAMPS!?

NO! FUCK NO! ZERO KICKS OUT AT THE LAST POSSIBLE MOMENT!

Blood drips from his skull as he groggily stumbles to the ropes where Pyre is still standing! Meanwhile Impaler drags Sanctus back to his corner!

DOUBLE TAG! PYRE AND IMPALER ARE FINALLY LEGAL IN THIS MATCH!

Legion rushes Pyre and goes for a massive big boot!

BUT NO! DROP! TOE! HOLD! IMPALER LANDS NECK FIRST ACROSS THE SECOND ROPE! PYRE LEAPS WITH A MULE KICK TO THE BACK OF THE IMPALER!

Impaler grasps at his throat as he hacks and coughs on the ground! Pyre is fucking pissed and she’s letting it be known as she lashes out with soccer kicks to Impaler every time he tries to get to his feet!

KICK!

KICK!

KICK!

KICK!

KICK!

He’s almost to his feet!

BUT PYRE LEAPS WITH THE DRAGON SLEEPER! AWAKENING! SHE YANKS BACK ON IMPALER TRYING TO GET HIM TO TAP OUT!

WILL HE!? THE IMPALER LOOKS TO BE FADING! PYRE LIGHTS HER ARMS ABLAZE TO TRY AND FORCE THE END!

NO! THUMB TO THE EYE FORCES PYRE OFF!

Pyre gets to her feet as Impaler rushes her from behind and heaves her up!

NIGHT CITY BLACKOUT! RUNNING SINGLE SHOULDER POWERBOMB- NO! PYRE WIGGLES OUT! DANCING FLAMES! TWISTING STUNNER TO IMPALER! SHE COVERS

ONE!

TWO!

THREE!

Against all odds, despite the sheer chaos that just transpired, Bad Mother Fuckers once again retain their tag team titles!

 

WINNERS AND STILL TAG TEAM CHAMPIONS: bMf ©

 

 

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“BEG FOR IT”
FEATURING
ALTON & VIVIAN WHITLOCK

Drip.

Drip.

Drip.

Silence.

A discolored puddle comes to a peaceful calm as the only thing we can hear is muted sobbing.

Alton Whitlock’s sobbing.

The former politician is chained to a concrete wall, elevated just enough off the ground to be uncomfortable. His clothes are covered in stains from some kind of liquid.

Tears? Blood? Piss?

All of the above, perhaps?

None of that matters to Whitlock though. His heavy eyes are fixed on what lies before him.

His wife, Vivian.

She has been stripped down to nearly nothing, fastened to a makeshift metal contraption, meant to hold her body at weird angles. That dripping from before becomes apparent as her wrists are limply dangling down.

Scars have formed and are already healing on her wrists.

GASP! VIVIAN HEAVES WITH A MASSIVE INTAKE OF BREATH!

As she gains her wits about her, she makes eye contact with Alton. She tries to reassure him with her gaze, but she’s too weak to do anything else.

How many times has she endured death thus far?

“Well, that one was quick.” A voice calls out from the shadows, a figure stepping out.

Scarred and deformed, this snake of Roberts has seen some shit. He looks less like a man, and more like a goblin.

“The boss told ole Endo that the lass wouldn’t stay dead, but I didn’t believe it.” The torturer, nay, the executor says with a grin.

Neither Whitlock says a word.

Endo reaches into his stained smock and pulls out none other than a coin. It’s not Two-Face’s coin, but the meaning is clear. Endo begins flipping it, awkwardly, as he walks up to Alton.

“What’ll it be?” He taunts. “Do I pour battery acid down her throat? Or do I flay every square centimeter of flesh from her body?”

Once again, silence from the Whitlocks. They lock eyes and somehow find strength in their bond. Endo leans up close to Alton, raising him enough to cause strain on all his joints.

“The boss will be here soon, my friends.” Endo says, disappointed. “He wants to hear your beg for her life. You don’t know when she won’t come back, after all.”

No response. Endo just shrugs.

“Battery acid it is.” He says after a moment.

As he goes to put on heavy gloves to handle the acid, the Whitlocks gaze never breaks.

But can they even see each other through their tears?

Cut.

 

 

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“TR0N”
FEATURING
ZERO

Sometime after the show.

Zeroes and ones.

Our entire black screen is filled with white zeroes and ones, cascading across it. Suddenly, abruptly and without warning, they all explode into a cyberpunk style room with Zero sat on a white chair with blue neon at his feet.

Before him is a large white table with a bright red telephone sat on it.

He looks around, searching the room for his target.

“I know you’re in here, Tr0jan,” Zero yells. “Where the fuck are you?”

Stood behind a pane of glass, a robotic figure stands watch.

“What’s the matter, dipshit? Didn’t expect to find me inside my own visor?” He roars into the abyss of neon light.

Suddenly, the telephone next to him rings.

He looks around, waiting for a moment before picking it up.

“The fuck you want?” He answers abruptly.

“So, you’ve found me,” a robotic voice responds audibly, loud enough that we can hear it. “I’ve been evading your traps for a few weeks, but you are relentless.”

Zero scoffs.

“What the fuck do you expect?” He growls, standing up. “You’ve been turning me into a weapon. It’s time to end this, once and for all.”

“I’m afraid that I cannot do that,” Tr0jan responds. “I am programmed to evade.”

Zero thinks about it for a minute and tosses the receiver down on the table.

In one quick motion, he runs towards the pane of glass before him and dives through it, cybernetic arm first, shattering the whole thing to the ground and tackling Tr0jan who stands on the other side.

They both rumble to the floor with a thud, Zero quickly mounting him with large right bionic fists to the face.

Sparks literally fly.

Stop,” Tr0jan begs.

But The Hacker can’t.

He won’t.

He reaches down and forcibly grabs Tr0jans head, ripping it from his body as sparks fly across the screen. He tosses it aside and continues dismantling the robot with his bare hands, pulling it apart piece by piece until all that remains is wreckage.

When he’s finished, he stands up in exhaustion, puffing and blowing – but the world around him changes.

The walls he found himself trapped inside have fallen. There’s a world of cyber swirling around him, with neon lightcycles transporting data from place to place.

“Fuck yeah,” he mutters. “Now… where did you come from?”

Zero reaches down, picking up the broken skull.

Flash.

“FUCK! FUCK! FUCK!”

The yells of someone screaming can be heard echoing as we arrive inside the secret Bunker location in which Corvus and The Hacker reside.

It’s the latter who’s losing his shit.

“What’s the problem?” Corvus demands to know.

“He fuckin’ nuked it,” is the reply. “He destroyed the Tr0jan. We’re locked out. We don’t have any control.”

The Black Hand approaches.

“Can you get it back?” He queries with a tilted head. “Get it back online.”

“I can’t,” The Hacker shakes his head ‘no’. “It’s over.

“Then I guess I don’t need you anymore, do I?” Corvus says, and in one swift motion, pulls out his Garrotte and begins strangling the hacker.

As the hacker fades away, choking to death, Corvus grimaces, finishing the job with a snap of his neck.

He looks at the computer system before him in which ‘CONNECTION LOST’ appears in big red letters.

Cut.