Promos

"Your pain has a purpose" - Philippians 1:29 A grain of sand. Harmless enough in itself, but when it finds its way inside the shell of an oyster it causes a continual irritant. The oyster attempts to get rid of it by coating

“A friend of mine used to receive death threats every single day. He wasn’t too popular at high school.” “The first time it happened, you can probably imagine his horror. The note told him that he’d die at four pm after

Something so simple, like a flame can lead to grave consequences. It can burn down people’s dwelling places. Their mode of transportation could be engulfed in flames. And more seriously, it could lead to death. But with the right precautions, have the proper safety

It all began with a single mark. A curse for the unforgivable sin of fratricide yet was undermined time and time again because they truly did not know what death was. The first in a very long line of excuses from the

A man walks alone on a cold winter's night, straying further and further from a familiar trail. The storm that blew in made the environment an unrecognizable one to the traveler, on account of the influx of snow. The freezing temperature began

"A group of kids gather around on a nice sunny day." "They huddle into a circle before all of them but one scattered in every direction." "The little boy that was left alone turns towards a tree and covers his eyes." "One.." "..Twoooo.." "..Three.." "The other

"A neighbor of mine wanted to be an actor ever since he was a little kid." "He aspired to make his way to Hollywood and become the next box office draw." "Everyone he knew and met said that he had the talent

"Time is what we want most but what we use worst." Consider the value of a second. To the giant tortoise, who live for hundreds of years, a second is but a blink of an eye. Their lifespan filled with hundreds of

"The casting couch is where dreams go to die, man." "Well, maybe not." "You see it all the time online on every porn site as far as the eye can see and the dick can jack." "Girls trying to make their name in

Have you ever heard of the White Death? In the span of 100 days, over 500 Soviet soldiers succumbed to it. During that time, no one knew what caused these men to perish in the prime of their lives. These men went into

Three adventurous entrepreneurs come together on one fateful evening in Encino, with no other intention but to vibe until the sun went down. But, deep down inside, something fucking magical happened. They built something that people were interested in. Lovers arrived, and so

There was once this monk who had learned of our society. He saw the disappearances of people from this village and was determined to find the source of it. Long did he search for the clues, prayed for guidance from

The preferred method of killing a rabbit is dislocation of the neck; the rabbit is held by the rears and head, stretched at full length, and then pop - with a sharp pull, the head is bent backwards. I prefer more of

Hi everyone! I'm Chip Montana! And I'm grabbing nature

“I have placed my rainbow in the clouds. It is the sign of my covenant with you and with all the earth.” -Genesis 9:13 We all remember the story of Noah saving all the animals by coupling them up and loading them

"An old master had a lesson to teach his students." "In his hand was a stick which he swung violently through the air. He showed off its speed, the wind whistling as it flew by." "He wanted to teach them a lesson

When you’re shut off from the world, that’s when you find out who you really are. Every waking moment becomes dedicated to the one thing that you can find happiness in. Some people start stuffing their face, turning their loneliness into a

Old Man River down the road was a real dick. He lived on a farm. Twenty acres of pure grade a shit where he could live like the cunt he was. He stayed out of everyone’s way, so we stayed out

Humans have a saying, right, that good things come in threes. But they also have a saying that bad things come in threes. So does everything come in fucking threes? That doesn't make any sense! But this is the human

“A friendly, honest, lovely young man once took pity on a Junkyard dog.” “The dog was tied up in all weather, starved, kicked, beaten, and left to rot in the most dangerous of places. His owner didn’t care about him or

“Mr. Simon had a big bad fuckin’ dog.” “And he treated that mutt like a piece of shit.” “Every day, in the blazin’ sun or the pissin’ rain, that dog would be tied up in the yard to bark his days away

"My soul doth magnify His word." Light is all around us. Incandescent, white light that we take for granted yet is essential for life. Invisible to the naked eye, yet we feel the presence of that light in everything. Without it, we are nothing. But

Do you know what it’s like to be bound to someone.  To be beholden to their every whim against your will.    Because We do, a witch in the early nineteen hundreds managed to summon us and bind us to her.  For ten

There was a man who dedicated his life to travelling around the lands and collecting objects. Building a vast collection of the finest rarities and treasures, the man covered every unfathomable corner of the world. He wanted it all and he

One of the funniest theories that humanity seems to have about the universe is this ideal of pure evil. That someone is just snapped into existence consumed by darkness. Every person I have ever encountered was born a pure soul. It's

  STARBOY has no problem getting his LOVEstick rocked, cocked, and ready to go. Anytime, any place. STARBOY can get it up

Hi there! I'm Chip Montana! And I'm grabbing nature

"When it comes to getting my hands dirty, I'm no stranger." "Many moons ago, a man came to me to make a deal." "He wasn't the greatest of men. In fact, he was an average drug dealer looking for his rise to

All a human ever wants is to find the One and settle down, right? That's what I'm told at least. That's not how we fucking do it, that's for sure. Maybe that's why I'm drawn to Starboy. He'd fit in

When I was a kid, I had an Australian Shepherd named Ace. Ace was an energetic sumbitch: a ball of energy that chased every little thing he saw with all he had. Neighbors, birds, bats even. Cars… Speaking of, there was this old

A man looks around a record shop, looking for some of the old hits on vinyl. He passes right by the newest presses, heading straight to the retro section of the store. And, after some foraging around, he happens upon the perfect

Every single year, on average, 56 million people will die each year on Earth. 56 million motherfuckers. Not me, man. Not me. Truth is, I'm terrified of dying - and they'll tell you that this fear is completely normal, until you see some Red Bull-soaked

I was greeted by the voices every morning when I was locked up in testing. T Incredibly vicious voices, at that. They begged me not to get up. They tried to convince me that where I was just had to be better than anything

"There was once a gang that ruled over the Sodapop Frequency before it became our hangout." "This group was deluded into thinking they were the baddest motherfuckers on the planet. They acted like they were hot shit and convinced others into

"Let's view Fate like a puppet show." "They say that fate manifests as a series of strings that leads you through life in a very precise manner." "Like puppets to the hands of an unseen puppeteer all people in this reality follow

"Have you ever heard of puppy play?" "It's simple. One person gets on all fours, puts on a leather dog mask, and acts like a little bitch for their owner." "Kinda hot, won't lie." "See, these subs, or dogs, are entirely at the

As the world spins its endless cycle, us human beings do the same. Wake up, get ready, go to work with people you hate to support the people you love, come home and give the people you want to give the

Scriptures foretold that the second coming of Jesus Christ would signify the final judgment of people worldwide. Based on their behavior and adherence to Christian doctrine during their tenure on Earth, each person would be sentenced upon their death to hell,

"The ocean is where I go to lose my mind and find my soul." A wise shīfu was once asked about those that seek enlightenment but get lost in the process. His reply was simple. Consider a fish. A small fish swims up

'Everything seems impossible until proven possible.' It seemed like an impossible feat, to put a man on the moon. We look up at that night sky and see it shining down, but for every day in history up until July 19th,

We used to enjoy the theater back in the mid eighteen hundreds, during that time we made friends with a master of the stage. The man specialized in dark comedy.  In fact, he was real Clown Prince, a Madcap maestro

“When I was a boy, my father wanted to lay a new sewer line in the yard. It was a monumental task of epic proportions and frankly, I was terrified of it.” “We were going to need to dig a forty-foot

    You ever get that feeling when you’re around someone your sexually attracted to? You just have this raw, animal, attraction to them. You haven’t even bumped uglies yet, but for some reason something is drawing you into them. Could it be gray sweats

Once upon a time, along a now faded river , there slept one single man with a vision. A desire to unleash belief that would better society, and would create a utopia beyond human comprehension. A powerful son took the fragments of

There was a fish that was confused about his identity. He did what any fish would do of a day: swimming around, chasing the smaller fish, trying to muscle in with the bigger ones. But he always looked longingly out

I still remember the world, from the eyes of a child. I once thought the world was a warm and safe place; that my Brother and I would be okay. I always wanted the best for us but after the Embrace,

"A young lady spent most of her life moving in and out of orphanages." "She didn't know her parents. She knew of a sister and brother, but she had never met them as far as she could remember." "She went well into

“And may your hearts be fully committed to the LORD our God, to live by his decrees and obey his commands, as at this time.” -Kings 8:61 Commitment is the trait of sincere and steadfast fixity of purpose. It’s an act of binding oneself to a course

"Only the curious fish get caught

“I once had a mountain of revision to do for tests.” “I remember sitting at my desk, bopping my head to the newly released Jump by Van Halen, trying to find a way to focus on the task ahead of me.” “It

We once watched as group went into a long-abandoned sanitarium. They went in obsessed with exorcising the ghosts of the past. They bit off more than they could chew that evening, as they were ill prepared for what met them, and none

The corner became a lot scarier when I found a girl there. Her name was Gail. Smart girl, driven, real all-American type. But she didn't have a lick of common sense. She melted at the attention from this older guy named Tye.

A group of Sabbat had broken away from their group. Three very different Kindred with very different views on what they were to be to the world. One loved the oldies, the music of forgotten ages and the golden age

My mom used to sell Mary Kay. What the fuck is that, you ask? Those in the biz will tell you that it’s empowering women, that they have world-class cosmetics, and that it’s a place where you can be a millionaire. If

Possessions. People and their possessions. They'll fight that it's theirs until they don't even know who they are anymore - and it's a slow, cancerous burn. Ever lost something that you thought you needed? The hours you'll spend, far more committed than you've ever been, trying your hardest find it. And the

My dad was my hero. He still is today but when I look back at all his little intricacies, all the habits I thought were so random, I realize he was just another man trying to do his best. One of

Friendship is like a really good car. You honor the shit out of it. You use that hard-earned money of yours to keep that car maintained - showroom quality - and you take every opportunity that you can to show that car off. There isn't

"If you want to be a good tagger, there's more you have to possess than a spray can and a wall." "You have to make that can your bitch when it's in your hands. You need proper can control when painting

"You guys remember that dirt bike I used to own?" "I absolutely loved that thing, man. I hopped up on that bad boy and it was smooth sailing as soon as I took off down the road." "But, you know, no matter

"Let me tell you about a man who was born in chains." "A slave from birth, ever since he could walk he could remember chains clinging to his skin and dragging him down into the dirt." "And every day he was reminded

"Now if you obey me fully and keep my covenant, then out of all nations you will be my treasured possession

Let me see if I've got this right. I think I picked it up from a friend. I'm sure I got it. A Lord, a Lady and a Monk walk into a bar

“My mom used to be a church goin’ woman.” “Every Sunday in the hood, she’d drag us by the drug dealers, the hookers, and the gang bangers to go sit in some rickety broken-down church. Rain or shine, she’d have us

What is the greatest weakness of the human species? Is it our need for sustenance to fuel every cell in our body? The reliance on spending hours a day in a prone unconciousness that science still cannot understand? The innate

Hi! I'm Chip Montana! And I'm grabbin' nature

There was a time that I had to deal with a copy cat in 2008; the Kindred was in the UK basically trying to be the new Jack the Ripper. The Kindred would walk the streets, hunting Kine; the Kindred

Each generation that succeeds the last brings with it revolutionary change. From the age of stone to the age of bronze, from the age of the sword to the age of the gun, each successive generation brings with it more

They say that those in absolute power - engorged in fame and all the bullshit that comes with it - are there because their eccentric personalities are housed within the "dark triad" of narcissism, psychopathy, and motherfuckin' machiavellianism. Grandiosity, pride, egotism, remorselessness,

There was a great fire and it raged for years, wreaking havoc upon anyone and anything caught in its path. So fearsome and destructive was this blaze it razed an entire civilisation, rendering it sterile of all life. But soon that fire

“I’ve shed blood, sweat and tears for the Rewind Championship.” “I sweat to win it. I battled through hellacious circumstances to take that title home. I’ve held it three times and defended it twice. Every time I set foot through the

Brothers and sisters of this congregation, I come to you asking a simple question. How are humans different from animals? It's not our opposable thumbs, primates have those. It's not our ability to use tools, crows have the capability. It's not even coming

A young man sought to prove himself worthy, and began to climb the nearest mountain. The trek was arduous, made more challenging because of a light snowfall covering it

We once lived a life as the head of the town guard during the fourteenth century. We found ourselves just outside two warring nations, we attempted to remain as neutral as we absolutely could in that situation. A couple months of battles

A man once dreamed of climbing a mountain. He had traveled and found himself staring at the foot of the mountain, determined to climb.  A local Sherpa stopped him and asked if he would like a guide to help him scale the

Have you ever tried bowling? I went bowling recently with the Rainbow Party gang, and it was fucking magical. I realise these things are probably mundane for humans but for someone like me - I've never seen bowling before. It

  Never judge a book by its cover. You will never know who that person is or what that person is all about if you only pay attention to what is on the outside. You don’t know what they have gone through,

There is this belief that twist and change fate are doomed to die. That their trangressions against the natural order are absolute and the Harbringers are judge, jury and executioner for the good of the universe. Yet I learnt very early on

When I was a young boy my father took me into the city to see a marching band. He said, “Son, when you grow up would you be the savior of the broken, the beaten, and the damned?” He said, “Will you

Hi there! I'm Chip Montana, and I'm grabbing nature

"Imagine a man who is fixated on power.." "This man would be willing to go to the ends of the earth in order to collect any sort of advantage over the next man." "Though he may create alliances to reach the next

A young reporter in the nineteen-fifties looking for his first big scoop, went to the docks to look into a smuggling ring.  Hours later he stumbled through the door of his apartment a sucking chest wound where a blade had been

The man who has it all is most tempted by greed. You see it all around in the news. Fucking Elon Musk or Jeff Bezos, walking around with their billions, but it's just not enough for them. They always want

A ship sailed through the many seas, its captain on a mission to collect the world's greatest treasures. The captain had collected all but one, vanquishing all those that tried to keep him apart from his prize. One remained to complete the

My first memory of death was when I was seven years old. My uncle had a farm, and he bred horses. Not just any horses, but the best of the best. Real thoroughbred racehorse shit, right? Well, that didn't count ole' Triple

Let me tell you about this new picture. Walking Sally. It’s a cute little movie about this dog named Sally. Nobody wanted her because she ate everything in sight, and wrecked everything she touched. That depressing little backstory leads us into the

My PTSD haunts me like a demon. I can’t escape it and once I thought I have, it comes back like a nightmare. Hearing my screams of fear and pain, seeing my sire’s face, the smell of blood, wondering where my

"I'll be the first person to tell you that I don't always get to swallow everything I eat." "Sometimes the food fights back and I end up painting the floor with vomit." "I usually spew when what I was eating tasted that

It's amazing what power information holds. Just a few nuggets of information can crumble mighty empires or lay the foundations for new ones. A few bits of information about taxation? A nation is born. A warning laid out with the evidence to

Millenia ago, our savior was confronted for breaking bread with sinners by men who knew the words of the Bible but not the spirit of the lord. To these Pharisees he responded, "Which of you men, if you had one hundred sheep,

Little fly on the wall, why are you such a little disturbance? My God, it's like you want to be my new friend. But don't you understand that I have things to do? I'm a busy boy these days and you just can't expect me

Portraits are our way of trapping memories, ya'dig? Whether it's your house, your momma's house, or your momma's momma's house, the inside walls are occupied with frozen moments in time - when things just felt right across the universe. You see all

"Remember when my mom got cancer, Wiz?" "It was fucking rough, I swear I spent the whole first night crying my eyes out while you and Ether tried to keep me together." "Now, the worst thing about cancer? You gotta fight it

"Imagine flies in a web." "They are powerless to the forces that be. Small, weak, insignificant, those flies landed in the web because they were trapped there by a force beyond their comprehension." "The spider." "Cowardly, calculating, the spider lays out its trap

"Life is only a reflection of what we allow ourselves to see." In the midst of an identity crisis, an animal came across a pond. While usually still, the water of the pond was disturbed and rippled. When the animal gazed

'Wheat and weeds cannot grow peacefully together. Any gardener will tell you that

“Our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ entrusted three servants with bags of gold, so that they could grow their master’s wealth.” “The first servant, he was given five bags of gold and asked to retain or improve upon this wealth.” “The second

A shadow that tore itself apart in the blinding light to drive away the endless night. An unfeeling monster who gave up eternity to see a little birdie fly once more. A psychotic madman obsessed with love who trapped himself in an

Have you ever known someone who sucked? Like, they sucked so bad at something that it was all they were ever known for. They could be good at something but it doesn’t even matter. Because all that people remember or associate with you

"It's a popular belief that no matter how many sins one may commit during a lifetime.. all will be forgiven so long as they repent before the rapture." "A young male spent his entire life causing ruckus." "He was the type of

My brothers and sisters, Has anyone in the house ever felt down in the dumps? Trapped in the shadows— out of reach from God’s ethereal light? Contemplating antidepressants— or worse? Then please lend God your ears this morning, because this sermon is for you. Sadness-uh— Is

There was a cyclist on a journey to find paradise. On the way the cyclist hit this really rough trail. The ground was uneven, difficult to navigate with rocks and stones of all sizes and angles, and no safe footing. You don't

Y’all ever acted in an ensemble flick? I thought not. See, when you step onto set for a picture with a lot of moving pieces, you have to quickly learn your role. Look at the Avengers. Robert Downey Jr. is the man. Iron Man,

Misplaced faith is a dangerous thing. Think about it, people are inherently built to place their faith in something. Some people take an item of some kind, and put their completely trust into it. What that item is can vary between

A group prepares for war, gathering an army of the best men they can find. These are the strongest, the bravest, the wisest to serve their leader. Each man plays an important role in the success of their army and the opportunity

"There was one religious kid that used to follow me around and found fault with just about everything I did." "Every time I wanted to indulge myself in all the pleasures life has to offer, they'd be there to call me

Admittedly trapped in my own mind as of late, I've had some time to invest a little bit of my thinking time to a lot of interesting things. Things that made me stoic, things that made me catatonic - and there

"So, in BDSM there's a certain kind of activity we call flagellation." "I prefer to call it whipping, but that's because I can't spell flagellation through text." "Now, when it comes to whipping, there's two ways to go about it. Either you

"There was a man who once walked side by side with Jesus Christ on a sandy beach." "This man, a disciple, a believer in Christ, saw him as his lord and savior. He walked with him because he believed Jesus was

Where can one be full yet empty at the same time? Some might say heaven, full of joy, empty of pain. Others think hell, full of torment, empty of jubilation. However, the place I'm referring to is somewhere we can go to right

Mining has always been an ugly and dangerous necessity in our world.  A mountain gutted for its resources, left shallow, an empty husk of what it once was.  The majesty that once was left a desolate wasteland.    Flora and fauna that

Ahhh, the little deviants. While it's not my usual business to deal with them, every now and then one will come to my attention. Little creatures who society would reject because they don't fall into line. Our society knows what

"Karma has no menu, you get served what you deserve." A man was traveling a notoriously dangerous landscape when he saw the clouds of a storm appear on the horizon ahead of him. Seeking shelter from the storm, he came across

“Life is a journey, not a destination. The journey IS the destination.” There are two types of people in this world. Those that take the highway, and those that take the winding road. Highway dwellers are obsessed with but one factor. Time. They are

When I was embraced; it felt like time stood still. When you’re being embraced, you’re dying; it felt like time was running out. If I was going to die, I was gonna go out fighting. I never asked to be

I'm not sure if you've ever tried explaining human emotion to a fucking alien but it's not that simple. I'd been told that humans were led by their emotions and doubted that it could be as obvious as that, but it's

Oi! I'm Chip Montana! And I'm grabbing nature

Ever been to a casino and just observed the people around you? Millions of people flock to casinos in Las Vegas, New Jersey, and even in overseas destinations like Monaco and the Bahamas. STARBOY was once flown out to Macau, China

"Some of you may be familiar with the story of the thirsty crow." "it is said that on one hot summer day, a crow flew through the skies looking for hydration. The sun had beamed down fiercely for the entirety of

Zealotry is a horrid thing in any community. Whether it's the origins of the name, the Jewish Zealots who opposed the Romans and wished to create a world Jewish theocracy, or the Crusaders who battled in the Holy Land to

"There was a restaurant I used to go to called The Facts of Knife or some shit like that." "I'll be the first to tell you that place fucking blew chunks. The food was terrible, like the kind of dogshit you'd

"There was once a man who wished to be amongst the stars." "Dreaming of leaving the world beneath his feet behind as he soared into the night sky and entered space at the speed of light." "This man, you see, was an

Once upon a time there was nothing I loved more than to sit down with a great book. I was a real bookworm, burrowed away in my favourite spot, just me and the magical pages of a great book. Reading these stories

The untrained dog will remain rebellious. They'll do what they want, oblivious to a sense of authority because it never really existed. They'll tear precious valuables to pieces, and leave the remnants of their own bowels on the floor - a marker that symbolizes

It’s high noon. Two gunslingers, Ace and Jim, stand in the middle of town facing one another. They’ve been here before, stood in this exact same spot time and time again. Each one of them knows exactly what the other will do

Growing up, I’d watch the kids play outside of Alexander palace; I never once joined them since I didn’t feel that accepted, I knew from day one I was different. I kept to myself and only interacted with my twin

I'm used to being looked at. Stared at as people pass me in the street. You'd think it wouldn't bother me by now, and you're half right. People take one look at me and think "What the fuck is that!?". I

I had just left University when I found it.  I thought it would be great addition to an ensemble, it became far more.  The mask spoke to me, it told me of eons of history.  It told me of a conflict with the

If we claim to be without sin, we deceive ourselves and the truth is not in us. John 1:8 You see if we are not even going to be truthful to ourselves, how can we be honest to others about what we

Samson was a warrior of great power, but it came at a great personal cost. His life laid out before him, Samson was destined for greatness. He was a Nazirite, born into a life of dedication and service to God. It

In every great tale of human history, there are certain archtypes that persist throughout the millenia and OSW has been no different. The monster, the hero, the psychopath, the underdog and the greatest of them all The mastermind. Intelligence personified with an ego

STARBOY had started to go through a dry period. Business wasn’t booming as it once was and instead of his phone notifications going haywire around the clock 24/7, he found himself staring at the screen waiting for a text or a call. He

When I first arrived here, my host put me up in a typical human spare bedroom. A nice comfortable bed. A small TV in the corner. Bookshelves containing the books, DVDs and CDs he had managed to build up during

"There's always that one girl in every neighborhood." "You know the type. She's pretty and well dressed. She seems funny and smart at the same time. She seems like she has it all." "Every guy in the neighborhood lusts after her. They

"Every cereal worth their shit has a mascot featured on the front of the box." "Captain Crunch, Toucan Sam, Lucky the Leprechaun, and so on not only help their brand stick out from the rest of those bland store brand or

Some of the greatest games in the world involve a combination of skill, strategy, and sheer luck. The perfect game can be found at the intersection of the three

"Every school had those kids with an absolute hard on for their teacher, right?" "And the teacher knew it too! She'd see these kids who stayed behind after class to talk to her, chatting away like they had a chance, and

As long as I can remember, I've had a fascination with music. My parents always told me I was the kid who danced before he could walk. Dancing eventually progressed to singing and my favorite place to sing was in the back

“The last echoes died on the white slopes; the new mount glittered and lay still in the silent valley.” - Evelyn Waugh   To face the full force of an avalanche is the greatest fear of those that climb the slopes. We learn to

Oi! I'm Chip Montana, and I'm grabbing nature

Nobody ever sees until it’s too late. Nobody but me. When I was a freshman, there was this kid named Tyler. He talked funny since he wasn’t from around here. People loved him, though. He’d walk through the halls like he was hunting wabbits,

"When you lay down with snakes, expect to be bitten." A vet was once presented with a strange case. A man owned an enormous python. Every night, the man would sleep with the python in his bed. In what he thought was

I once knew this punk who thought of himself as one of these free fucking spirit-types. He was like something straight out of the 60s, but in his own warped mind, this bohemian was somewhat of a New Age fucking traveller,

It was 2007, when one of the biggest boy bands of all time officially disbanded. 1.8 million records of N*Sync's last album sold - and they earned hundreds of millions of dollars across two tours for this record.  And then as

Man was created by Yahweh in his image. Yahweh then created woman to fulfill man’s needs. Together man and woman were designed to work side by side to achieve greater heights than they could individually by committing to one another through the

“Imagine one big mother fuckin’ field.” “That shit is overgrown as fuck.” “There’s giant fuckin’ weeds growin’ all over the place, the odd beautiful flower and there’s a dipshit ‘thinker’ stood beyond it with a group of cunts, tryin’ to figure out

When you smell it enough, the stench never leaves your nostrils. The stench of blood. I'd pat their back, push them forward onto the table and as they settled down and lowered their guard, slit their throat. Sedation was not

“The road is a long and winding one.” “Everybody has their destination.” “You’ll find all kinds of modes of transportation on the road. Each one travelling towards that destination as its own speed, in its own style.” “You’ll find Wiz there as he

"Her name was Haley, and she was the hottest bitch in the hood." "Everybody wanted a chance to clap them cheeks, yet nobody was ever able to catch her eye." "They pulled out all the stops to try to impress her. Either

Long ago, there lived a great Dragon. In his youth, this Dragon had terrorized all that he laid eyes upon. Whatever he wanted, he took. Because none could stand against his might. All those who opposed him were burned to ashes,

When thinking about one's humble abode, many avoid imagining blood on the walls, limbs strewn upon the floor, and scattered viscera from the people who resided there. Most would consider that a nightmare. That's with the reductive thinking of a self-absorbed mind. You

"Two brothers, born from Adam and Eve, were working on offerings to please Yahweh." "Both of them lived different kinds of lives. The eldest brother, Cain, was a farmer. Meanwhile his younger sibling, Abel, was a shepherd." "Cain offered the lord the

The universe used to be so simple. The makers spinned life into existence,  the weavers crafted the threads that would twist and shape their destinies from their very first breath to their last and then the destroyers clipped it from the

"Everyone listens to the radio. Whether you're in your car or fiddling with Spotify on your phone, you're listening to it in some form or another." "Of course, people don't just listen to it. They're messing with the frequencies trying to

After our embrace, we suffer a curse. A beast is born inside of us, that drives us. Makes us hunt, to consume precious life. We live our unlives in an attempt to satiate it, to keep it from unleashing it's

"You ever have a train ran on you?" "Might seem weird to think about, right? The person getting railed by cock after fat cock has to be a bitch for getting fucked by everyone at a party." "But you'd be so god

“I have spent my life on a seemingly endless treasure hunt.” “My whole existence has been spent with a map in hand as I wandered through temples and across beaches looking for the priceless artifacts hidden within their grasps.” “The truth is,

Chess, at its core, is a simple game. One gameboard, sixty-four squares, and sixteen pieces for a player to control. Each piece has a unique pattern of movement, all with the goal of putting the opposing king in checkmate. To bring about the

Back in the 1970s, Hollywood was stifled by a motivated group of zealots. The residents were conscientious of places they shouldn't go, times they need not vacate the security of their own home, all because of a movement that promoted a weapon

"Blood! It's your new rack of lamb, your new champagne, your new fucking heroin!" -Smiling Jack. VTMB Every year in OSW, the lambs walk into the slaughterhouse, everyone is a little lamb being led to slaughter and what happens is gruesome. The

A flock of little sheep freely grazed out in the pasture. They roamed around their environment not knowing of what would come next. They went about their day eating from a trough of corn feed and soybeans. Unknowing that their farmer was fattening

I love a lot of things about my Rewind Title, man. I love how the sun reflects against it while resting on one of my mantles. I love how the red looks against my sunkissed complexion. I also love the fact that it fits perfectly over

After They murdered my family, they put me to work. It took me a little while to bed into it, but eventually, I was the bees fucking knees. See the way I approach a job like that is I take some

Growing up in the seventies, it was like every motherfucker just wanted to be in the band. In the sixties, we’d been spoilt rotten by the array of musical talent hailing from both sides of the pond. There were The Rolling Stones,

It’s been quite some time now that I’ve stood guard on the rolling fields of OSW. My flock of ninety-nine Christians reside here, adjacent to the Slaughterhouse steeple, living by Yahweh’s commandments. Together we serve under Yahweh in hopes of one

A storm starts and wherever it does it could be many things. If it's off the coast in the tropics, well then stand back because you may very well have a hurricane coming through that will tear apart lives. You have low

"It takes more than just a good idea to write a good book.." "While a good idea might be the first step, it is also the most common." "Everyone has a great idea." "It takes careful plotting to put a good idea to

On Friday, Jesus held a meal with his disciples. He knew it would be his Last Supper, for he knew the path ahead of him. On Friday, his blood was spilled. He was beaten, whipped and nailed to a tree. On Friday, the lamb

They once thought Everest unclimbable. The great mountain stands tall, unmissable. It carries a mystique and gravitas that lures climbers to be the next on a very short list of people to conquer its slopes. Climbers that believe themselves capable and climb

One. Just one single pang of hunger is all it takes. Because you feel that pang, and you find something to sate it. A chip, perhaps? You eat the chip, and it feels so fucking good. But it doesn’t fill you up. So you

Hollywood is driven by Blockbusters. You know the ones, big movies that make hundreds of millions at the box office. They’re what people come out to see, the event flicks that will live forever. To work on one is the pinnacle

The castle was under siege. There were swathes of enemies surrounding the fort, all readying for an attack, because they wanted the gold crown held inside the castle’s walls. Eventually one of the aggressors moved forward with their army, having proven themselves

“Attached to my right arm, a Black Hand used to reside.” “It was a big fuckin’ Black Hand with five beautiful fighting fingers.” “And when it came to losin’ that mother fucker, I was fadin’ in and out of consciousness and I

“Life is like a camera.” “You must focus on what’s important.” “Lambs to the Slaughter might just be the most important match of my Old School Wrestling career to date. It’s the night one person becomes special. But if you focus on

Over the millenias, I've been privileged to bask in the presence of some of historys greatest. I dined with Caesers, I waxed lyric madness with Divinci and Tesla and personally witnessed the horrifying charisma of monsters like Dracul and Adolf

The chameleon. One of the most beautiful creatures to have graced the face of the Earth. Quick and cunning, adapting to their ever changing environment at a moments notice. They can be seen constantly shedding their skin so to speak, or  changing their

So I'm told that Christianity is all about worshipping God and his immaculately conceived son, Jesus, who is also God. They love Jesus, because he was a good bloke, who managed to feed like a million people with a single

"There was once a young man who held the entire world in the palms of his hands." "He was a symbol of one man who stood for the people. He knew what people wanted and he tried everything he could to

People often hide their eyes behind sunglasses. They become a stimulant for those finishing last in the confidence race. They feel in control of something and it makes them feel good to know that, especially while in the presence of people that look

Forgive me father, for I have sinned. I hanged a man in Yahweh’s name, and as punishment have been banished to the Lion’s Den tonight just as Daniel once was for praying to Yahweh. For I’ve seeked out many abominations under this

Names hold weight unlike that of most other words. When one is uttered aloud, it holds more than just a mere set of syllables. With a name, there comes identification. Attachment. Eventually, all that encompases who you are becomes interwoven

So there's this spring in Northern California that I went to as a kid

It’s tough to let go, isn’t it? When I was growing up, I was given this blanket. It had all the big kid icons of my childhood plastered on it, and I loved that thing. It was always on my bed,

I used to date this dude named Bryan. When we got together, it was explosive. Every second we were together was nothing more than an emotional mess. We fought more than anything else, but I did everything I could to force

A couple has been married for quite some time, and now find themselves in dire straits. When they exchanged vows, they made it clear they would stay by each other forever. To have and to hold. Till death do they part. They were inseparable,

"A restaurant I used to frequent was looking for a new chef after the last one they had fucking quit on them." "A friend of mine, eager to impress me, applied for the position so he could see me more often." "At

"Do you know what a simp is?" "A simp is the kind of guy who sits at their computer all day every day watching as a girl who barely knows he exists talks on stream or shakes her ass on OnlyFans.

"Take a dog and lock it up in a kennel." "Deny it food, water, and attention." "What does it do?" "Most times, it will rock the cage, slamming back and forth in an ill-fated attempt to escape its confines. See, when it's caged

My aunt was different than most. Most are the loving kind that will be like a second mom to you. Others are the fun aunt, the antithesis to your parent's strict ways. A dichotomy that's so clear and consistently present you don't know

Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall, Humpty Dumpty had a great fall. All the king’s horses, And all the king's men, Tried to put Humpty together again. When Humpty Dumpty had his fall all his followers mourned his demise. Humpty was their great leader, their guiding

I heard a story once of two thieves. The first cared only for trinkets and items. Things he thought provided power to himself, to extend his reach and influence upon the world around him. He chased after these trinkets with a

My sister once came upon a pit of snakes. Nested together a writhing mass of scales, fangs, and muscle.  When they realized my sister was there one of them lashed out missing her

“If a blind man leads a blind man, both will fall into a pit.”  I remember hearing of a news article when I was younger. A tale of two men who had reportedly been out walking and were found drowned in

“I remember this one bitch.” “This girl stood in the middle of the street like her shit didn’t stink. She was wavin’ about a fuckin’ bible, shoutin’ about God, sinners and the wrath of her Lord Almighty.” “So, I stopped and talked

A young man was once given a job as a lumberjack, and he was eager to begin work. “The more you fell, the more you will be paid” the foreman told him.  The eager young man set to work with gusto. By

“I once knew this totally tubular dude.” “He was the guy everyone liked. He was the coolest of the cool; like the Fonz!” “Everyone wanted to be around him. Just being in his presence made you feel like the cool guy, too.” “Then

Ya know, in my experience, people in positions of power often enjoy the act of relinquishing control. I used to know this guy; real high flyer. For a living, he was chief executive for one of the biggest blue chip organisations on

Trolls are originally from Scandinavian folklore, numerous tales are recorded about trolls in which they are frequently described as being extremely old, very strong, but slow and dim-witted, and are at times described as man-eaters and as turning to stone

Imagine the worst thing that's ever happened in your life. Maybe it's a terrible accident, someone you cared deeply for that you lost, or a great failure you could never reconcile. Now imagine that every time you close your eyes, this moment

Coming out as lesbian, gay, transgender, whatever label you want to put on it can be a long arduous process. It all comes down to the made up, fictional, non existent, “closet door”. There are those who peek through the door and

Quality vs quantity is a tale as old as time. Even in the days of Odawara past, it was old .Should one make as much of something as they can, or spend the time to craft a single piece of

My father’s mother was the biggest hoarder I ever came across. While most people hold vague recollections of their grandparents owing to their warm smiles, distinctive perfumes, or generous offerings, mine stays fresh in my memory for one reason and one

"There once lived an ancient man who sought the secret to immortality." "This soul feared death more than anything else in the world. His creaking bones and sagging face were a constant reminder of how close he was to approaching his

When I got my first tattoo, I remember being afraid of what the people in my life would think. After all, one of the earliest things I was ever taught was that your body was a temple and you honor it

For decades I’ve watched as noble, true hearted people have fallen victim to charismatic men with a twisted visions at their lowest moments.  I watched as people met their fates in Jonestown.  Saw the vision of body bags being haul out of

"The scorpion and the frog is a tale as old as time." "A scorpion once found itself in need of passage across a river. As such, it reached out to anyone who would listen." "Most of the river dwellers were weary of

Meiji. To most, this word refers to a specific era. However If you were associated with the Odawara, this word symbolizes an apocalypse. It was a moment where the sun went down for good on a clan - when their Daymio was forced out

There was a cat that used to go around the neighbourhood; some stray that belonged to no-one. I would watch it come into the street, over the garden wall of the first house and it would shower that homeowner with love. That

At Up in Smoke, you could smell it. You could see it. You fuckin’ choked on it. The flames were barely ignited, and plumes of smoke converged over Old School Wrestling, bringing men and women to their knees, gagging at our very presence.

I was fifteen years old when I went into a coma. They thought my life was over. Every single success I’d had up until that point meant absolutely nothing. Pam Hart won piano competitions, sang arias in the big opera house. She

Dinner time at the Newton household was always weird. See, my old man always invited over my Uncle Dave. Pops and Dave had run the streets together for years. Every little thing they touched turned to gold. Their businesses raked in

The feared Black Knight is a figure you can you can find Arthurian legends; People can’t figure who it is nor can they deiced if it’s actually Sir Lancelot or Sir Morien because of his skin colour. Many of times the

Colour is fucking amazing, right? It astounds me every time I think about it, that everything in this world is some sort of mixing pot, and the colours that surround us are the work of some artist deity who wanted his

The star football player at the University STARBOY was attending was known to be quite the bully. He played his star status to his advantage every chance that he got. He had no problem sticking his nose up in the air like

Drenched in blood from karnage most foul, one singular moment exemplifies the chaos that three little letters would carve into this universes soul. It's not the loss of innocence as the live of a simple man seemingly fades away bathed in

Perhaps, you'd like to hear my take on the tale of three ambitious little pigs who stumbled upon a quiet clearing in the expansive forest. While in a bubble of their own infinite excitement and wonder, they took the surrounding silence as

A long time ago, there was a group called the “Society of Leopold” and they were vampire hunters. The group believed everything supernatural were part of the Anti-Christ’s army; they believe it is their divine duty to slay or otherwise

When I was growing up, my favorite day of the year was Christmas. I was fixated, the very first thing I did every morning during the holidays was think about what day it was and how many days were standing between

Even in science, there is a sense of art. Something studied for its pure, empirical insight still has room for something to be admired. To be loved. Consider, for a moment, the prism. A simple object of basic material that reveals a complex beauty

"After spending all day fucking shit up and making people our bitches, we go out to eat at whatever fast food place is nearby." "Usually it's a McDonalds or some other burger joint we end up stopping by. While we're there,

"It happens all the time." "Imagine the end of spring and summer is just around the corner." "The sun comes out to shine more frequently." "People's attitudes are starting to liven up." "And then, some unknown artist from no where drops a hit track

"Imagine, if you will, a rag." "What is its purpose?" "The answer? The rag exists purely as a tool for cleaning, cleansing the world around it. Seeped in soap and dripping with water, a rag is a tool for the righteous cause

"You're a sinner!" "God doesn't love you!" "You're going to hell, faggot!" "I heard that shit every day for about eight years." "The religious kids in town were as fucked up as they come. They were, like, obsessed with the gay dudes in town.

Would you believe I'm a fan of motor racing? Well, many moons ago, there was a race car that totally dominated the circuits. It was the baddest on the track. I mean, this car, it had everything. It was constructed of the finest parts,

I heard a story once about a successful group of soldiers during the crusades.   Who upon their deaths, found themselves in front of Saint Peter.  They thought they’d be judged worthy of the light of their God.  They had slew so many

Zealots. Every last one of them. They catch a whiff of anything evil, anything not of Kine and they hunt them down like rabid dogs. The Inquisition has been a thorn in a Kindred's side for centuries. Whenever one is called,

"A great civilization is not conquered from without until it has conquered itself from within." All roads led to Rome. It was the very centre of the world. The greatest empire that the world has and will ever know. Stretching for some 2.3

Building a house is useless without a good firm foundation. So what makes a good foundation? First and foremost, I’d say it’s important to be stuck firmly into the ground. You can’t build a house on loose ground, because it won’t be

The Trinity. Father, Son, and Holy Spirit. The centerpiece of Christianity. See, the Father came first. He’s the Old Testament asshole god, the one that demanded sacrifice and would bring a storm down on the whole world because people took something from

My Uncle told me to live life like a moving train when I was a kid. Now I didn't know what the fuck that meant; the reckless youth in me didn't connect well with the metaphoric field goal, if you get

Three is the first number to which the meaning “all” was given. The triad is made up of a beginning, middle, and end. Together, they are whole. Stories are more effective, persuasive, and memorable when focused on three points or ideas. The

“When I came here, I wanted nothing more than to be happy.” “Happiness was the goal. It was the very thing I was striving towards. I didn’t know what it’d look like, but I knew that I wanted it.” “And when I

“A group of taggers made a small town’s life miserable.” “Every week they’d make their way to the towns display wall and spray paint it with whatever the fuck they wanted.” “And every single week, the townsfolk would roll their eyes, angrily

"Hey Ted, you see the new guy that got signed, that lucha-guy?" "No Phillip, I didn't notice the new signee, when it's my job to film everyone with a camera. No shit I noticed him." "Ted, why are you always this aggressive?

“I am the shadow, the true self” If this was Persona 4, if you reject your shadow self; you’d get thrown into battle; if you accept it, it becomes a persona. But in all honesty how many people at OSW are

You can't go anywhere without someone passing judgement on you. Speaking loudly enough so that everyone can hear and make their own judgement or assumptions.  Every day people around the world are being judged. They are being told that they should believe in

“Forgive me father, for I have sinned.” “For centuries I’ve partaken in countless invasions to ensure and enforce Yahweh’s word.” “It all started during the crusades when I led my troop of holy knights into enemy territory. Little did I know that

When I still had my workshop, an old chessboard and its pieces were donated to me. The King, The Queen - even the Rooks were well-presented in mint ivory, like antiques that were protected from a forgotten time. And then there was

When I first came to Hollywood, I found it a lot like church. See, when you go to church, you’re stepping into a hallowed hall, built on the backs of those who came before. Their words, ideas, and even their garb

I once observed a civilisation that relied on sacrifice and war. The greatest of their warriors would flock to this tiny village in the middle of nowhere, all for a singular purpose. From the free willed to the sanctimonious, to the heroes

I am convinced, the way one plays chess always reflects the player’s personality. If something defines his character, then it will also define his way of playing. My grandfather, the avid player, always talked about this philosophy he had. The first time we

Close your eyes… Go to sleep. Imagine an imposing building, made of concrete and steel. Bars cover its narrow windows, and tall fences topped with razor wire surround it. Beyond the chainlink perimeter lies dense wilderness, perilous terrain, and hazardous wildlife. The fortifications—be they

"At the heart of a small village towered a totem." "This totem was over 40 feet tall and so round you couldn't touch either side." "Legend has it that if a man or woman could ascend to the top of the totem

"Me and my grandfather Dante don't have much in common, but we both have bottomless stomachs and an appetite for glory that neither of us could satiate." "In his glory days, he would devour whatever morsel landed on his plate. From

What does a man do when he's all out of options? When he's at the end of his rope? He strikes a deal with the devil. A bargain that puts down a soul as collateral. A contract that is signed in blood. For centuries, mortal

"A man had a dream to become a highly ranked executive at a prestigious company." "To accomplish this, the determined soul had to work hard at pleasing the higher ups and proving his worth as an employee. With gritted teeth and

"You know, I actually quite like action figures." "They may be a simple children's toy in essence, but if you take them and let your mind run wild, you can make them do anything you could possibly want." "Take one in either

Once, when old days were young, a monk traveled on a dusty road to a far off monastery. He had been sent there by his guru, a wise and noble man, to temper the anger that dwelled in his heart.

"School bullies are some assholes, right?" "See, when I was a kid, my mom didn't have a lot of cash for a long while. We were out there scrounging pennies, she was doing three jobs, and I was going to bed

On the highway of life, stagnancy does not exist. There is only movement, once you make the decision to enter the on-ramp. And as you make your way into the cluster of lanes, the only option that you have is to remain fearless

When a teenage girl transitions into a beautiful young woman, she is habitually advised by those around her to take precaution. To be especially careful. To go equipped. Often, simply being aware of eager, appetent young men is not enough to save the

"Pride cometh before the fall." They built the unsinkable ship, the best the world had ever seen. The captain of the ship, in his ego and pride, pushed it to its limits. His pride came before the greatest maritime failure the world

A child is lost in this world. Parents have long since passed, family is non-existent. Bouncing from home to home, with nothing to ground him. One day, a kind older gentleman comes along. He sees this poor boy and takes him

So, my aunt was realtor and when I was younger she sold a house. Made a pretty penny on it too. Shame she didn't disclose the many infestations that she knew about in that house. It cost her dearly you know, because she

Three men are slashing through a landscape in search of great power. On this spinning rock nothing carries power quite like gold. During their expedition they encounter plenty of adversity, but the greatest of all arrives when all three slip unwittingly into

“The law once made me complete community service.” “And they saw fit to enter me into the Big Brother program.” “They gave me this snotty nose little white boy who loved to skateboard. Once a week for a year, I had to

"Even the smallest kitten is a lion in its own mind." To the mouse, the kitten is deadly. It had sharp claws and teeth, a killer instinct learnt of its kin. It was a huntress, who sought out vermin to catch. It would

Long after the books were burned, I watched the birds. They'd often keep me company through the longest days. I once saw a crow, black in colour. Crows are considered the messengers of the bird world, trading notes about death with

“Have you ever heard the story of the China-man?” “The China-man owns a small farm in a tiny village. One day, one of his horses bolts from the farm and runs away. All of his friends from the small village rush

They say anyone can do it. Just do the right thing at the right time, and voila… Success. So let’s boil us some water. First, we need a pot of water. Cold water, water that has been restrained from its true desire. Given the

I remember the day They first came. The sun was high in the sky. They were fucking brazen to come nearer noon than midnight, that's for sure. I remember the screams first. Gutteral screams of those I knew and loved.

Just for a moment, imagine plunging your fist into a raging inferno. In an instant, the  pain paralyses you for an agonising moment as your skin begins to bubble and boil, every muscle aching as waves of blistering torture flow through

There once was a cat by the name of Sarafina who ruled a trailer with three humans in it; the cat was timid for the most part, she enjoyed her tuna, cat tree and the naps. Her interactions with the

A feel good story is like Cinderella - because she was never supposed to be Cinderella to begin with, ya'dig? This girl was supposed to spend her remaining days sewing, cooking, and cleaning while her sisters attended all the cool parties

Three lines. Five syllables, then seven, and five once more. Short, sweet, and a breath of fresh air. The form of haiku is designed for simplicity, ease, and to shine bright at a moment in time. Written to catch the

I think it's appropriate for us to talk about the Tremere - a clan of mages, spellcasters, and warlocks - And backstabbers, according to other vampiric kinships. The power structure of Tremere was a hierarchy held together by a mass Blood Bond

"I knew a girl that wanted to please me so badly, she tried making one of the most complex foods she saw in order to do so." "That food was a huntsman pie. The recipe she found online asked for a

All animals thrive on instinct. And perhaps the most curiously instinctual creature of all is the lemming. A small rodent that chooses to remain active year-round with no hibernation, and always following its primal urge to migrate. When the population becomes too dense

The birth of Jesus came during the reign of King Herod. A pathetic king with a large ego, and when three Wisemen came from distant lands speaking of the birth of the 'King of the Jews', he feared the loss of

"A rubber band is an interesting thing." "If it lies still, it doesn't do much." "But if you take it and stretch it, it builds up tension. This stress can be used for a variety of things, be it sling-shotting a rock

"I once knew this fugly old bitch who had a little obsession in her life." "And it's name?" "The past." "Memories of days long ago when she was happy, the world was simpler, and she was a whole lot cuter." "See, in her prime,

An assassin likes to remain unseen. Observant. Stealthy. When you least expect it they attack. And if done right, you will have never seen it coming. One client of STARBOY’s had an obsession with ninjas, and assassins. Something about a person creeping up from behind and

Growing up in a church, you start to shape your views on the world by the words recited to you every Sunday. Before you learn anything else, you are given the lord's most important directions. The blueprint for your moral code. The Ten

"I observed a boy that couldn't wait to take his father's place as king." "The elderly ruler was a frightening, but wise man that spoke softly and carried a big stick. He was highly revered throughout his kingdom and feared in

Back in my fledgling days there was a recruit who always seemed to have the edge. He was stronger than all of us, trained harder and longer because he had tremendous powers of recovery. His concentration, reflexes and agility were that

I remember when I met him. My grandpa. See, he’d moved away before I was born. My dad had worshipped the ground he walked on, riding up and down the roads with him. My old man had worked for his old man,

Life is fragile for Kine. They are born to die, some violently some peaceful. When you look at a grave marker, you see the hyphen in between the years. All of their life, all of their existence in that one

They put me on trial. My hands were bound behind me, my powers were dampened, and I was led as a helpless captive into the courtroom. The Judge greeted me first. He read my name in his little book, pronouncing that the

In my Snake Pit you’ll find folks from all walks of life. We’ve got road sweepers, surgeons, teachers. Hell – I've even had me a professional fucking drag artist. Wherever these people appear from, one thing is always measurable: Perspective. Either they turn

Jesus Christ hosted a gathering on the eve of his arrest. That evening, unbeknownst to nearly all of his brethren, he sat surrounded by his apostles to eat his final meal before going to the cross. Scribes would infamously dub this “The

"There's this fucking dickhead called Wiz." "And this was the best God damn day of his miserable pathetic little fuckin' life." "He woke up on a Monday morning feeling fresh as fuck. This was gonna be the greatest fuckin' day of his

I had Uncle who collected news papers, he said that it was history, and that within that history was power. That by knowing what happened in the past he could at least see the patterns of the future, like he was

"When I was about seven years old, my papa took us on a United States vacation." "To get to where he wanted to go, it was a long six hour drive." "Before we set off, he told us kids that if we

"A fire can be quite the attraction.." "The flames dance as the object that has been set ablaze burns." "The slow-burn begins, and while the object reduces to rubble, the focal point that is the flames begin to burn brighter. Over time,

“There ain’t a lot of parking outside my apartment.” “You gotta get in whilst the gettin’ is good.” “I’ve figured out that if I get home by a certain time, I can park my car in the fuckin’ sweet spot. It’s this

“Imagine there’s a bank account that credits your own personal account every fuckin’ day with $86,400.” “$86,400 that doesn’t carry over from day to day and at midnight, that balance just fuckin’ expires.” “What would you do, Jet Set Dickheads?” “You’d draw out

“That bitch was a walking contradiction of who gives a fuck and what she wanted more than anythin’ was to fuck me.” “I remember her whisperin’ in my ear at a Halloween party that she was a vampire who wanted to

“She thought she could handle it all. That’s what she said.” “I used to fuck around and find out with this bitch who took cock like a fuckin’ pro. I’m talkin’ about a chick who could swallow ten inches of your dick like

“Everybody wants to be just like me.” “In the playground, I was the best fuckin’ tag player you done ever did see. I reckon tales of my exploits were shared far and wide.” “They heard about me in high school, I mean.” “So, naturally, every mother fucker

She was a miserable cunt who couldn’t be moved. It’s been a long ass week, getting my fuckin’ ass handed to me at Red Snow and I’m standin’ in line at the grocery store, tryin’ to buy a forty and some

There's a gang that's not only baffled investigating federal agents, but the entire Los fuckin' Angelas community. This isn't because they're elusive as ghosts towards authority, or because their stock remains high in the business of uncontrollable chaos. It's because they have

In a world cluttered with questions, an answer can mean everything. The little white church at the center of my childhood town advertised this through pamphlets that were handed out by its street-preaching recruiters. It's how my mother joined the congregation, right

You know what Tom thinks? He thinks that Jerry is just a shitheaded little mouse. An obnoxious rodent to society, and he's weaseled his way into sharing the same space and oxygen as him. He's beside himself over this. He tosses and turns, losing sleep, while the thought

In my golden age of growth, it was all about the biggest parties. And in those parties, you were either the host or the attendee. If you were the host, you managed to reserve your parent's house for the night while they were out of

They had me on medicine when I was a kid, to help me sleep. Being the introspective type and all, I thought about my life a whole lot when the lights went out - especially it ending when I least

Maybe it was Albert Shaw's 13-inch foot playing Miss Mary Mack with my dome because since then, I've been thinking about The Terminator - the Judgement Day one, dig? And I remember watching that flick as a kid and thinking it

It was called the "Big One" in Highland Park. We're talking about a skatepark bowl that was twelve-foot deep, ya'dig? My first day 'round these parts, and I was at the edge of it while a sea of BMX and skateboarding kings and

I remember the first time I had a close encounter with a blood-sucking leech. The family were vacationing down in Florida. Now whilst the Sunshine State is widely regarded as a tourist’s wet dream, there’s a darker, more sinister side to it

I’ve never been a religious man. But I ain’t some ignorant prick that doesn’t know his way around the bible, neither. The River Jordan was once the fastest flowing river of its size. They say the Jordan created a barrier between Canaan

A man stood at the foot of a vast mountain. The mountain was tall and threatening, and had quite the fearsome reputation. Throughout the years, it attained its renowned status through those who once stood in the man’s place. Who themselves had attempted

I used to know this chick, right? Proper fucking sad case. It wasn’t as if she was unpopular or anything. Problem was she just couldn’t find herself a decent fella for love nor money. When it came to relationships, she was like

Pinocchio tells the story of a little wooden puppet who’s dream it is to be entirely human. When his maker wishes upon a falling star, he desires that Pinocchio will one day become a real boy. That night, a fairy appears and

I used to know this feller, right? Real nosy fucker. Guy loved nothin’ more than to grab the figurative trowel with both hands and dig deep into matters that didn’t concern him. Every so often, I’d try and warn the prick off. I’d

In the town where I grew up, the natives used to hold this annual competition called The Derby. Once a year, a load of these crazy motherfuckers would arrive in convoy; each with the intent of becoming Derby Champion. The Derby itself wasn’t

Close your eyes. Go to sleep… Imagine a thin, wizened man wearing hand-crafted jewellery and religious headdress. Carrying a cloth-covered basket hanging from a pole over his shoulder, he wanders from town to town… Stumbling upon a festival, the nomad sits cross-legged and places

Close your eyes… Go to sleep. Imagine a majestic lion. Piercing eyes; fiery, flowing mane; glossy, golden coat. Moving with grace and agility which belies its size and power, it leaps onto a platform - to the applause of an enraptured audience. Their adoration of the animal, though, is curtailed by the sudden appearance

Close your eyes… Go to sleep. Imagine a yellowed, faded, dog-eared document. Hand-written on vellum—prepared animal skin—mysterious illustrations, glyphs, and an unknown language adorn its many pages. Scholars and professionals of various disciplines have attempted to translate the centuries-old manuscript on many occasions. Diagrams of people, flora, and strange symbols appear to

Close your eyes… Go to sleep. Imagine a small, insignificant creature. Skin, scales, feathers - it matters not. Having been mortally wounded and then picked at by scavengers, the pitiful animal has managed to evade danger, crawling in a vain attempt to escape death. Succumbing to its injuries, the lowly critter perishes, leaving a

Close your eyes… Go to sleep. Imagine a mound of red clay, taller and wider than any man, in a candlelit attic. Standing on uneven legs, with misshapen arms, and a large head with crude features, the earthen sculpture is a vague approximation of a human being. Admiring his

Close your eyes… Go to sleep. Imagine a wooden figurine dancing on stage in front of a crimson curtain, in a darkened theatre. The grace with which it moves belies its hinged joints and metallic hardware. The spotlight illuminating the figurine catches on several translucent strands dangling above its

When I was younger, I saw something that utterly disgusted me. My grandfather had a botfly lay eggs in his ear. He heard scratching and scaping while he was sitting still. Eventually he goes to see his ear, nose, and throat

A while back I watched as an associate of mine attempted to blackmail someone into doing his bidding. Someone he thought that he could out think him at every pass. When things went tits up and he came face to face

My younger brother loved to play with fire. It started with his enjoyment of just the warmth of it all, how it comforted him. Then he fell in love with the flames just wanting to see it grow bigger and

Before I donned the mask, before Impaler, and before

Sodom and Gomorrah, two cities that were monuments to their own sins. They were a cancer upon the world. A plague of immorality and epicureanism so wrapped up in their own prurient and self-indulgent nature that they would not listen to the alarm bells being raised and warnings

Time, the sands of fate, the inevitable force, it has so many names for one thing that is so intangible. They say it is the ultimate killer, that father time will commit us all to history eventually. Poetic really to think

Poachers, some fool hardy hunters who choose to hunt big game on the open plain. They’re dangerous to the ecosystem, killing, and maiming the world around them. They bring traps and other sundries to gain an unfair advantage over nature.

Every year people try to climb mount Everest. It is a dangerous and unrelenting trek where phishers that threaten to send you plummeting to your doom. A simple misplaced tether can take out an entire party of climbers. All the while,