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Mating Mantis

Mating Mantis

The most misunderstood insect is the Praying Mantis.

More specifically, the female Praying Mantis.

Some scientists decided to stick a bunch of Praying Mantis in a lab and observe their mating trends. The males would look for the most well-fed and satisfied females.

All the better to pass on their DNA to. And more importantly, the more full the female is, the less likely she is to eat the male.

Yeah, you heard me.

What the scientists observed was after they’d danced the mating dance, some females would rip the male’s head off and devour him. He’d served his purpose, and who wouldn’t pass up a free meal?

But that was in a lab.

In the wild, it was a little different.

The female would still rip the male’s head off in the wild, but they didn’t bother eating the male.

See, here’s the devious thing about the female Praying Mantis: The male can live without its head, all it does is control inhibition.

Once that’s gone, the male goes crazy, fertilizing any egg it gets its mandibles on.

All while the female walks away, satisfied that she got everything she possible could out of the sad sap.

For as smart as my handsome hubby is, he has never understood me.

Just like every other male, I suppose.

When he found me, I was very well-fed and satisfied. I’d razed Wonderland, found a worthy teammate, and was ready to take what was mine.

Tag Titles. Invasion. World Title. I had a lot of eggs out there.

As long as we were in his grand scheme, his lab, Simon never thought of dancing the big dance with me. Because he knew what would happen if he did. He knew what I did to those I was done with.

But now that the Blackharts are in power, now that Simon has ascended to the top of OSW, he believes that it’s time to dance the dance.

Ain’t that right, hubby?

You think you’ve fattened me up so much that I won’t want to feed on you, that you can get what you want and nature won’t take its course.

Shaw. Jet Set. Storm. Zero. Deathnote. Even Death himself.

You used them to make me stronger.

But that’s a rare mistake from you.

Your little lab, your little scheme, has never been more than an illusion you sold yourself to feel like the Taskmaster you claim to be.

We’re in the wild, we’ve always been in the wild.

And we’ve been dancing the dance for months now. You’ve fertilized every egg I’ve laid before you.

Remember Invasion? My World title victory?

You did that for me, but make no mistake:

We were dancing the whole time.

And I made sure you lost your head the first time we laid down together.

All of your schemes, your devious nature… it gave way to madness. It gave way to you doing everything in your power to fertilize my eggs, to give me all that I wanted.

Like a sad sap.

But Simon, I’m hungry again.

And this time I’m taking more than your head.