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I Wonder

[Felix Foley]Fathers are tough.”

[Felix Foley] “I know how it feels, Tombstone. You probably ferried my old man some time ago – I wonder what he said about me?”

[Felix Foley] “I wonder if he showed remorse for the vicious beatings he gave me on a near daily basis? I wonder if he felt shame for the things he did, or the hospital staff he threatened, or kept quiet abusing his power?”

[Felix Foley] “I wonder if the man you took to his final destination, weighed up his life on the scales of good and bad, and came to the conclusion that his journey was to the underworld and there was nothing he could do to prevent it.”

[Felix Foley] “I wonder if he begged.”

[Felix Foley] “I wonder if he found himself on his hands and knees, pleading for his life, like he had me do time after time.”

[Felix Foley] “But I think most of all, I wonder if he ever really cared about me at all. I wonder if all the beatings were so that in moments like this, against my best friend Doom, Dr. Death and you, Tombstone, that I’d stand up and be counted as a man of worth.”

[Felix Foley] “Then I wonder if I’m giving him too much credit?”

[Felix Foley] “And if when I stand in that ring at Anarchy Rulez and if I’m crowned the new OSW World Champion, does he take responsibility for making the man you see before you today? I… wonder.”

[Felix Foley] “Or, I wonder if everything I’ve accomplished in life… my television show, my stage show, my presence with kids who need a father figure in their life… is in spite of it. I wonder if I’ve been one half of the OSW Tag Team Champions and the longest reigning NXT Level Champion because I’m resilient – not because he made me that way. Not because his beatings made me stand up, again and again, only to get knocked back down.”

[Felix Foley] “But because I, Felix Foley, chose to fight tooth and nail to survive.”

[Felix Foley] “I… wonder.”

[Felix Foley] “I wonder if he ever loved me? I wonder if he ever intended to support me? I wonder if he ever had my back? I wonder if he knew what I could be? I wonder … I wonder … I wonder …”

[Felix Foley] “And so do you, don’t you?”

[Felix Foley] “Igor Mortis might not beat you. He might not break you. But you seek his approval like a father, none the less. You know what it’s like to wonder, Tombstone. You know what it’s like to wonder all those things I just said about love, support and what you could be.”

[Felix Foley] “I wish we didn’t have to wonder.”

[Felix Foley] “It’s not fair.”

[Felix Foley] “It’s not right.”

[Felix Foley] “But fatherhood comes with a responsibility to make men and women. It comes with a responsibility to be more than the sum of those parts too. Not all fathers can do it. Not all of them are capable.”

[Felix Foley] “I hope you don’t have to wonder about Igor for long, Tombstone.”

[Felix Foley] “And I hope you know the answers to everything I wonder… and I wonder if you’ll tell me.”

[Felix Foley] “I…. wonder.”

Felix Foley