What’re you waiting for? If you haven’t applied to join OSW already, you should be on your way there. Failing that, be sure to follow us on Twitch at TheRAGEsmash and FastLanePlays!
Back to Top

Hail, Simon

Hail, Simon

Centuries ago there lived a renowned war general who could draw up brilliant battle tactics.

He lived in rather tumultuous times, and this man used this very chaos to his advantage, gaining control of an army of his own, conquering neighboring armies and lands, and even starting a revolution to conquer his own land.

His brutal, ingenious battle tactics catapulted him up the ranks of society, and he projected himself as a god to his subjects.

But just as quickly as his rise to the top was, his fall from grace was even faster.

For those he used on his way to the top were turned off by his dictatorship and turned against him as civil war erupted.

You’re quite the war general yourself, Simon.

Always seemingly a step ahead of your adversaries, you’ve managed to concoct just enough chaos to create a path towards getting your conniving little hands on your holy grail: the OSW world championship.

These are indeed godless times here in OSW. Without a true authority in place, you’ve gained control of your own army of goons and started a revolution against the very people you previously aligned yourself with.

You’ve never thought of your allies as anything more than acquaintances, however.

You’re the king of your world, and everyone else are your subjects. The worker bees to your queen bee.

And you’re hoarding all the honey.

Well, you’re in for a rude awakening.

Every move you make to get ahead in your chess game is tempting fate, but you just can’t admit to your mistakes because of your overinflated ego.

Your god complex is what will ultimately do you in.

Like you Simon, Julius Caesar thought himself to be god because he assumed he had all the power, and thus all the answers.

That’s when he was blindsided by fate.

This will be your fate.

You’re blind to the fact that your dictatorship is creating more enemies than allies.

It’s only a matter of time until Jet Set Radio become fed up with your self-serving directives and turn on you— ending your reign as the grandmaster of OSW.

Because no matter what kind of chaos you ensue upon your enemies or how far in advance you plan ahead in battle, the truth is, despite what you think, you are not in fact in control.

No one truly is.

And you may think you have it all figured out, but there is only one master plan, and that is YAHWEH’s plan.

There’s only one man who controls all; there’s only one man who has all the answers.

That man is YAHWEH.

You’re just next in a long line of false prophets whose demise blindsided them at the height of their power.

Allow me to cure your blindness, Simon. Let Vayikra shine YAHWEH’s light upon you so that you may see the error in your ways.

For we are YAHWEH’s warriors, and we are always accepting of new war generals joining our ranks.

All it takes is a crucifix and some self sacrifice to get yourself closer to YAHWEH.

And closer to the truth.

Deus vult.