Static covers the screen as a Play ► symbol appears in the bottom right-hand corner.
We cold open in the backstage area of The Slaughterhouse, in which Zero can be seen entering a locker room with a tray of drinks in hand. The OSW World Champion brings the tray to Simon, offering him the drink.
[ Simon ] “Good dog.”
He says with a sinister smirk.
[ Simon ] “Now, sit doggy – I have something to tell you.”
Zero grimaces, reluctantly taking a seat.
[ Simon ] “I’ve had a word with The Butcher and I’ve managed to find you an incredible opponent for tonight.”
[ Zero ] “What?”
[ Simon ] “I know; I’m wonderful, aren’t I? Tonight, you’re going to face SeeSaw in a Champion v Champion Match. Non-title, of course.”
The Champion stands up – only for Simon to motion for him to sit back down. Reluctantly, he does.
[ Simon ] “I want you to go out there and have some fun tonight. Give it your best effort – but don’t win.”
[ Zero ] “What the fuck are you talkin’ about, don’t win?”
Simon chuckles to himself.
[ Simon ] “Simon Says that I want you to lose, Zero. In fact, I’m going to accompany my little pet to the ring tonight and make sure that when push comes to shove, you make sure you follow my instructions like a good little doggie.”
The World Champion laughs.
[ Zero ] “Whatever you want, boss. Just remember that there will come a time you hand me those divorce papers, or I’ll rip em from your cold dead fuckin’ fingers.”
Sat in his darkened temple office, we find Sir Vant at a table, cloaked in shadow. His aged bible is open, and his knights stand at attention opposite him.
[ Sir Vant ] “… stand firm. Let nothing move you. Always give yourselves fully to the work of the Lord, because you know that your labor in the Lord is not in vain.”
Vant pauses, taking a deep breath before looking up from the bible to address his men.
[ Sir Vant ] “We have done many good works, but there are more meant to come in our holy mission. We will not linger in victory, but toil further in pursuit of wiping our sinful enemies from the face of the earth.”
Standing to his feet, Vant turns to the first of the three opposite him.
[ Sir Vant ] “Sir Gable. The Generation Kid must remain in our care. It’s your responsibility to ensure that happens. Because tonight, we see if your divinations will work as you say they will.”
[ Sir Gable ] “Understood. He will do as I said he would.”
Sir Vant turns.
[ Sir Vant ] “Sir Renault. Last week, Vigour made an agreement with the monk Banzan. They are supposed to meet tonight about his heretical so-called ‘alien’ brainwaves. I have made steps to ensure that meeting will not happen, but you must be there in Banzan’s stead. There is much we still do not know about Vigour.”
[ Sir Renault ] “It will be done.”
Sir Vant turns.
[ Sir Vant ] “Sir Bellator. You have already resumed Sir Gable’s good work with Starboy. Continue it. Do what must be done.”
[ Sir Bellator ] “There will be no mercy.”
[ Sir Vant ] “Good. Now go, Vayikra, do your good works and bring the Lord’s kingdom to glory once more.”
Sir Vant takes his seat as the three knights disburse.
This doesn’t sound good for anyone they spoke of.
KAINE KNIGHTLORD vs. SIR GABLE
Vayikra are intent on destroying OSW’s abominations but will Sir Gable bite off more than he can chew against The HellBat?
Collar-elbow tie-up between the two and Gable lays on a clinic, using a variety of holds and clinches against The Dark Detective. Knightlord is doing his utmost not to let The Olympic Gold Medallist have it all his own way but Gable’s chain wrestling is slick and his transitions and adjustments are as smooth a fresh cream.
Eventually this exhibition comes to an end as Gable topples Knightlord and tries to lock in a single leg Boston Crab but Knightlord kicks him to the back. The HellBat is up, off the ropes…..BIG LARIAT!!! Gable is still shaking off the cobwebs when The Dark Detective has him….JUST A BITE!!!! The vampire sinks in his teeth….OVER THE HEAD BELLY TO BELLY SUPLEX!!!! WHAT A COUNTER BY SIR GABLE!!!!
Knightlord pulls himself up by the ropes…GOLD RUSH!!! Speared out of his boots! Gable covers for ONE! TWO! SHOULDER UP!!! Gable pulls up Knightlord…countered into BLOOD DRIVER…Cover for ONE! TWO! KICKOUT!
Both wrestlers have given this everything tonight. They raise at the same time. Gable into a waistlock…GERMAN SUPLEX- REVERSED!!! Back elbow from Knightlord and spike DDT! This could be it as Knightlord lifts up Gable and nails the NIGHT RAID!!! Cover for ONE! TWO! THREEE!!!
The Dark Detective solves the case of Sir Gable!
WINNER: KAINE KNIGHTLORD
“JET SNAKE RADIO”
We find ourselves at a local skate park where a man is sat alone, looking depressed and miserable as he sobs. Upon closer inspection, we recognize whose red eyes have been in tears on and off for days.
We notice the Purple Pelican muttering to himself…but what it is we’ll never know, as Tag blindsides him with a look of absolute fury on his face. He kicks Wiz down hard, his face nearly slapping the concrete as Mr. Money Shot continues the beatdown with some hard stomps, all the while shouting abuse at the man who betrayed him.
[ Tag ] “You son of a bitch…how dare you! We’ve been friends for years, man, and you went and turned your backs on me…on Ether…on everything we stood for…and for what?”
Tag with another swift, solid kick directed right at the ribs of Wiz.
[ Tag ] “What business have you with Viper Roberts of all people, man? What changed?”
Wiz doesn’t respond, still sobbing…even more as a result of the attack from the man he once considered a friend.
[ Tag ] “Answer me, damn it! I need to know…I deserve to know, you snake!”
Wiz shakes his head, still refusing to answer even in the midst of his suffering…which really sets Tag off, and the beatdown intensifies as Tag shouts even louder at his betrayer, pushing him past the point of the concrete into a nearby field.
[ Tag ] “God damn it Wiz, don’t go quiet on me! If I’m not getting any answers now, I’ll get them from you at Between Fuck and You…either way, I will get the fucking answers I deserve!”
Tag doesn’t let up until he notices that the Purple Pelican is passed out unconscious. Tag stares at the the broken-down man laying before him, turning his back with a snarl on his face before finally storming off, leaving us with a beaten and bloodied Wiz, a broken-down snake in the grass.
THE IMPALER vs. SIR BELLATOR
An old hatred is renewed albeit with a reversal of dispositions. Can the Many use the power brimming with him or will the Templar use his doubt to make him bow before Yahweh?
The bell sounds as the Impaler rushes forward, trying for an Adam Smasher but the faster Bellator manages to duck under, springboarding off the ropes and taking Impaler down with an arm drag. The Dread Pirate staggers back up into a high dropkick that stuns him, before Bellator rushes forward, spinning around his arm as he tries to lock in the Arm of God. Impaler cries out in pain as Sir Bellator tries to stretch out and straighten the arm to fully get the hold locked in but Impaler is fighting it as he slowly rises up to his feet, Bellator hanging off and trying to drag the much heavier man down to the mat.
MODIFIED POWERBOMB! The sheer force drives Bellator nearly through the mat but the Impaler is feeling the effects of the armhold though, taking the time to get the feeling before rushing forward. ADAM SMASHER! Bellator tried to duck out of the way again but just gets clipped in the forehead which may well have been more damaging. The Templar staggering to his feet into a kick to the gut
NIGHT CITY…NO! Bellator manages to slip out, delivering a hard kick to the knee that drops Impaler down to the mat before a brutal enziguri to the back of the head dazes him. The Chosen One rolling forward as he sizes Impaler up for a moment, KNEELING SUPERKICK! CHOSEN GIFT! That has to be it as Bellator rolls down onto the unconcious Impaler for the one…two…three!
Sir Bellator pushes back the nightmare of Night City as he delivers yet another fallen soul to the grace of Yahweh here tonight
WINNER: SIR BELLATOR
With a frown on her face she scrolls through her phone, skating solemnly into the Sodapop Frequency, what was once the happy place of JSR. There’s a group text open on her screen filled with chatter from all three members, though it’s only been her messages in it since Lambs to the Slaughter.
[ Ether ] “Man…”
She comes to a stop near a bowl in the middle of the park, stopping as smoke begins to rise from inside!
LIGHTNING STRIKE TO THE BACK OF THE FUCKING HEAD! ETHER IS OUT ON HER FEET AND SLOWLY FALLS TOWARDS THE BOWL! LUKE STORM GRABS HER BEFORE SHE FALLS!
The A-lister leans her towards the fire filled skating pit, the phone dropping from her hands as Pyre stares back at the Hungry Girl with a terrible smirk! The heat from her flames lick at Ether’s skin, the girl already sweating.
[ Pyre ] “We were expecting a fight from at least one of your boys when we got in here. But, ya know? It’s fuckin’ empty.”
Storm chuckles, shaking Ether over the pit as the girl grunts in pain.
[ Hollywood Luke Storm ] “Yeah, I thought this was going to be harder. Turns out we can just waltz in and make some grilled bitch anytime we want.”
Pyre ramps up the flames, Ether covering her face as the flames singe her hair!
[ Ether ] “Get the fuck out of my pad!”
[ Hollywood Luke Storm ] “Oh? Tell you what, let’s finish this with some cunt flambé and maybe we’ll ditch this glorified college dorm.”
STORM DROPS ETHER RIGHT INTO THE FIRE!
And she lands face first onto concrete?
The Hungry Girl tumbles through the bowl, landing in the middle in a heap as Pyre chuckles, having extinguished the fire.
[ Pyre ] “Too bad that’d be too easy. You guys loved playing games with Luke’s life? You ain’t seen nothing yet.”
Storm helps Pyre out of the pit, both members of BMF taking their leave. Ether, meanwhile, pounds the concrete beneath her, angrily slamming the ground before snatching up her phone. It’s partially melted from the flames, a huge crack across the screen. She taps it, the crack going right through the background image of her and the rest of JSR.
[ Ether ] “Should’ve fucking put me in the fire…”
VIGOUR vs. LUCY SERAPHINA
Can The Price of The Party add a splash of colour to The Slaughterhouse or will Lucy Seraphina produce a splash of Vigour’s blood instead?
The Angelic Assassin charges out of the blocks at Vigour into a collar-elbow tie-up. The Jack of All Senses does well to check her momentum and throw her off with a hip toss. The Half-Blood is on feet, he sprints at Vigour…flying front dropkick….NO!!! Vigour dodges and Seraphina eats canvas.
As Lucy returns to a vertical base, Vigour lifts her up….VIM & VIG-REVERSED!!! Seraphina rolls out….VAMPIRE’S BLOOD!!! The swinging neckbreaker hits flush and Seraphina covers…ONE! TWO! THR-NO!!! The Angelic Assassin is denied! The Sovereign of Silence hits the top rope. SUPERFLYYYYY FROOOOG SPLAAAAASH….
NO!!!!! Vigour counters with a Codebreaker!!!! What a reversal! Now the good time guy is going to the top rope. Shooting Star Press!!!! Vigour loves a QUICK THRILL!!!! Legs hooked….ONE! TWO! THREE….NO!!! SHOULDER UP!!!! Ever the adrenaline junkie, Vigour again climbs to the top rope. A SPLASH COLOUR!!!! KNEES TO THE RIBS!!! Seraphina counters!!!
The Sovereign of Silence is up first, lifting Vigour and dropping him onto the top rope with a reverse suplex. Seraphina ties Vigour up in the ropes with MALICE’S BITE!!!! Four count from the referee and the hold is released. But has the damage been done. Lucy looks for FALLEN SORROW….Pele kick to block by Vigour…..VIM & VIGOUR!!!! And it’s done….ONE! TWO! THREEEEE!!!!
Vigour paints a victory with all the colours of the rainbow!
Backstage, we see Sigil preparing for his match against Luke Storm later tonight…but before he confronts the Blockbuster, he finds himself confronted by a different breed of man.
[ Sigil ] “What do you want?”
Sigil snaps at the Head Snake, none too pleased by his presence…but Roberts presses on.
[ Viper Roberts ] “I spotted Corvus colluding with Deathnote, he’s convinced the Shinigami that you have his Notebook.”
Sigil tilts his head, as if perplexed by the statement…but shakes his head in disbelief.
[ Sigil ] “I don’t see those two getting along all that well. Something about the Black Hand’s employer doesn’t strike me as something the Shinigami would want anything to do with. Besides…I know you all too well, Viper. You could be playing me…playing all of us. For all I know, you could be the one holding that book, and trying to get me killed. No, thank you..”
Viper scoffs at this, his voice stern as he speaks once more.
[ Viper Roberts ] “Listen, I know for a fact that Corvus has found himself some backup in Deathnote now…they’re coming, and that spells bad news, I’m sure of it. If I’m going to stick my neck out for this mess, I am backing the winning horse here…I’m backing you. For both our sakes, I suggest you do the same.”
Sigil ponders this for a brief moment, finally nodding his head in acceptance.
[ Sigil ] “Fine, I accept this little offer you’re making…but I wouldn’t mind something in return. How about…the secrets of your creation, Head Snake?”
Viper just laughs at the request, causing the Collector to stare his new ally down.
CHIP MONTANA vs. STARBOY
Tonight On Grabbing OSW by the Balls, Chip Montana tangles with the Lover of All. Can Chip wrangle the big black stallion or will he be another victim to the Chocolate Starfish Destroyer?
The bell rings as Chip circles the ring, clearly taking Starboy for the dangerous threat he is, slipping in and out to get the slippery bastard as he tries to trip Starboy down to the mat to lock him up like an Octopus but Starboy’s a limber critter as he slips out, springboarding off the ropes before nailing Chip with the GANGBANGARANG! Poor Montana crashes to the mat hard, all the wind taken from him as the Starfish Destroyer stalks him from behind, brandishing that deadly thumb high up into the air.
OIL CHECK! YA BLOODY DRONGO! Chip cries out in pain and shock, before Starboy delivers a brutal Donkey Punch to the back of the head. Montana looks out of it as Starboy tries to lift him up into the air but Chip slips out, dropping to his knees before delivering a brutal uppercut Right to the Substantial Down-Unders.
But Chip forgot Starboys have steel groin and that just enrages the species as he gets a stiff kick to the face for doing so before a brutal spinning lariat sends Chip inside out. Starboy isn’t done though as he tries to make Chip taste the Rainbow, RAKE OF THE EYES! Montana’s gotta calm down this wild beast now as he grips him around the waist, DOLPHIN SUPLEX! Montana rolls through as the referee counts, one…two…Montana has the ropes…three!
Once again, Chip Montana snares another beast in OSW as he manages to capture the elusive big black stallion and thankfully not have any lasting scars from the cheeky bugger.
WINNER: CHIP MONTANA
Backstage, having recuperated somewhat following his match earlier in the night, Vigour leans against a table. He’s in some sort of meeting room, with a Walkman in his hand and a flimsy set of headphones over his ears. On the table is a box full of CDs, each case with a small note from Vigour on it. “Try this one on a sunny day”, “Sad – bring tissues”, amongst others. It looks like he’s really getting his head round some of Earth’s music whilst he waits.
[ Sir Renault ] “There’s no secret alien message on those CDs.”
Vigour is startled and removes the headphones with a jolt.
[ Vigour ] “What the fuck do you want?”
Sir Renault smiles.
[ Sir Renault ] “I’ve come to visit you, of course. I hope you don’t mind me being here.”
Vigour places the Walkman on the desk and steps up to Sir Renault.
[ Vigour ] “I’m meeting Banzan here, so if you know what’s good for you you’ll get yourself gone before he arrives.”
[ Sir Renault ] “Yes, we’d noticed that you and Banzan seem to have struck up this little…partnership, though we’re not quite sure of what two beings such as you and he would have in common.”
[ Vigour ] “What we plan to discuss is none of your business, Renault. Now piss off before I set the Mountain on you.”
Sir Renault smirks with that evil grin of his once more.
[ Sir Renault ] “Oh, yes, sorry – about that. Unfortunately your new buddy Banzan won’t be joining you today.”
[ Vigour ] “What? Why?! Have you done someth-”
But Sir Renault is already gone, his laugh trailing behind him, leaving Vigour to wonder just what has happened to Banzan.
THE GENERATION KID vs. ETHER
Ether is stood in the middle of the ring, but where is The Generation Kid? He was kidnapped last week by Vayikra, and is nowhere to be found this week.
Left with no choice, the official makes the count.
1… 2… 3… 4… 5… 6… 7… 8… 9…
What the fuck? Where is TGK!?
Ether takes the no show win with a shrug and a grin.
Organ music begins to play as the static resolves itself into a scanline-filled screen showing a full robed choir singing an old hymn.
He’s got the little tiny baby in his hands. . . .
He’s got the whole world in his hands.
Two chairs are sat in front of the choir, with a small table between them. There is one cup filled with water and a jug beside it. One chair holds none other than Sir Gable.
The other is empty. For now.
He’s got you and me, brother, in his hands. . . .
He’s got the whole world in his hands.
From the side of the frame, a new figure walks onto the stage. He’s wearing a drab brown suit and holding a bible. Sir Gable stands up to shake the man’s hand just before he turns to sit down in the chair. As he does so, we can see the face of this new man.
It’s… The Generation Kid?
What the fuck?
[ The Generation Kid ] “Welcome, brothers and sisters, to the only television untainted by the hands of demons!”
[ The Generation Kid ] “This is the TGK Club, and tonight I’m going to be preaching on the sins of abomination!”
[ The Generation Kid ] “I ask you, loyal followers, to look to the bottom of your television screen. There’s an address there, send your vows of $1000 to that address, and plant that seed, brothers and sisters! Get your blessings, and join the fight against demonic forces. Because there’s only one Rainbow Party that matters, and that’s the one God himself threw when he made a covenant with Noah! Do not be deceived by the sinful ways of Vigour or Starboy…”
He pauses, conflict etched across his face. The Kid almost falters, but Sir Gable steps in.
[ Sir Gable ] “Please, my brother, take a drink of the water. You must be parched.”
TGK grabs the glass of water and drains it. After a moment, the resolve returns to his eyes.
[ The Generation Kid ] “As I was saying, do not let yourself be deceived by sinners! I once fell into their trap, and ran as far as I could from the Lord. But he found me!”
[ Sir Gable ] “Amen, my brother!”
The Kid stands up, his face red with passion.
[ The Generation Kid ] “Hallelujah! Praise his holy name! Amen! I fell, ah! Into the belly of the beast, ah! Surrounded by sodomites, ah! Beckoned to the gates, ah, of hell, ah! But my brother, ah. He saved me! Amen!”
The choir join in with their own words of encouragement as TGK wipes sweat from his brow with an old fashioned handkerchief. Sir Gable stands up, and hugs TGK.
[ Sir Gable ] “I’m proud of you, brother. Drink some more of that holy water. I’ve got a surprise for you!”
The Kid grabs a drink, while Gable nods offscreen. After a moment of commotion, the choir looks horrified as Gable welcomes the hulking form of SeeSaw onto the stage. But SeeSaw is dragging the unconscious form of Banzan behind him.
[ SeeSaw ] “I told your boss I’d bring Banzan to this Heritage Village. I want my reward.”
[ Sir Gable ] “In due time. Now leave this place, I have no further need for you here.”
For a moment, it seems like SeeSaw isn’t going to play along, but then he smiles and waves to the camera as he leaves.
The Kid stands over the fallen Banzan, while Gable speaks over his shoulder.
[ Sir Gable ] “He’s a harbinger of death, my brother.”
TGK nods, turning to the camera.
[ The Generation Kid ] “We’re out of time folks, next week on TGK Club, I will use the holy power given me to defeat this abomination right here! Don’t forget to send in those vows to reap your blessings! Amen, and good night!”
The screen goes back to static as we’re all left to ask one question.
What the fuck?
SIGIL vs. HOLLYWOOD LUKE STORM
An old rivalry sparks bright tonight as Hollywood peruses the Collection once more but will he slip once more into a Portal he shouldn’t or will the lightning show him the way through?
The bell sounds as both men rush forward, pounding down upon eachother with hard lefts and rights, no love lost between these two as Sigil slips underneath an uppercut before stunning Storm with a hard knee to the solarplexus before wrapping a claw like hand around his face and trying to force Storm down the Long Road Ahead.
Hollywood slips out thou, delivering a hard headbutt to the chin that leaves Sigil groggy before he’s thrown overhead with a T-Bone Suplex. Sigil lands hard on the back of his head as Storm quickly scrambles up to the top rope, urging for the Collector to get to his feet… BLAWKBUSTAA! Storm nearly snaps Sigil’s neck there as he muscles down for the cover.
ONE…TW…Sigil gets the shoulder up. Storm backs up as the groggy Collector slowly staggers up, rushing forward with the Lighting Strike…COSMIC LEAP! Storm nearly goes through the middle rope from the sheer momentum as he stumbles on his feet for a moment only to get a brutal chop to the back of the neck that’s anything but merciful.
Storm drops to one knee as Sigil backs up, looking to ascend to the Planes as he rushes forward, Storm ducking under the running dropkick but Sigil quickly pops a portal. Storm rushes to the ropes, springboarding off as a portal appears above the ring, Storm leaping forward as another portal appears behind him, PLANESWALKER TO THE BACK! Storm crumples to the mat as Sigil floats over for the one…two…three!
Hollywood thought he had all the angles covered but when you’re playing with portals like the Collector, the only outcome is total victory
Starboy sits, alone and without his Rainbow Party pals, in a room backstage. Relaxing on a comfortable looking couch, he has his feet up on the coffee table in front of him. As he lets out a contented sigh, theres a CRASH and suddenly the coffee table is no more, and Starboy’s feet fall abruptly to the ground. He stands up to confront the man who interrupted his rest.
[ Starboy ] “Starboy should have known you’d be somewhere lurking nearby. Starboy has always had a feeling you enjoy watching a man on his back.”
[ Sir Bellator ] “Are you done yet, with your disgusting monologue?”
[ Starboy ] “Disgusting? But Starboy hasn’t even got to the good bit yet. Wait until you see the array of items in my good time drawer – just perfect for the discerning man looking for a good time on his back. Can I interest you?”
Sir Bellator looks disgusted at the thought. He doesn’t know exactly what Starboy is referring to but he can imagine the items he’s speaking about wouldn’t be found in a supermarket.
[ Sir Bellator ] “This is precisely why I need to continue what Sir Gable began. There is no saving you, Starboy, but we have become concerned with the effect you have on those around you. Imagine all the children who could have their mind poisoned by you and your…nature.”
Starboy has heard it all before.
[ Starboy ] “If you’re here to beat on Starboy for knowing how to give anyone a good time, go ahead. If you want to lynch Starboy then go ahead and try. Starboy knows people have his back against the likes of you.”
Sir Bellator steps back.
[ Sir Bellator ] “Oh I’m not here to hurt you, Starboy – not today. I’m just here to stop you spreading that STARDUST of yours, like a virulent plague, around the innocent population. If you agree to it now, then we need go no further.”
Starboy feigns thinking about the offer for a second.
[ Starboy ] “Fuck you.”
As he says it, he reaches out and gives Bellator a gentle stroke on the part of his mask where the cheek would be. Bellator recoils in horror at the near-contact. Starboy giggles as he exits the room.
CHAMPION VS CHAMPION
SEESAW vs. ZERO
From a taskmaster to a madman, Zero’s descent into hell continues but will Seesaw drive him down further or will the Cackling Madcap be just a punching bag for the growing rage inside Mister Mother Fucker? Simon accompnies his dog to the ring for this one.
The bell sounds as Zero rushes forward, taking Seesaw by surprise with a brutal Firewall that nearly decapitates Fish with the sheer force. Seesaw staggering up into a flurry of lefts and rights before Zero grips him by the throat, Absolute Zero? No! Seesaw easily breaks the goozle, delivering a brutal headbutt that rock Zero before gripping him in a headlock and rushing forward.
CATASTROPHIC COLLIDER CACOPHANY! The bulldog hits hard as Seesaw quickly kicks Zero over to his stomach, and tries to grip his arms but Zero slips out, kicking Seesaw away from the submission attempt. Zero gets back to one knee, BIG FUCKING BOOT! The Hacker’s jaw nearly got broken there before he’s lifted high up off the mat, CHOOCHOO…YOU CAN”T POWERBOMB A MOTHER FUCKER as Zero counters with a facebuster.
Seesaw staggers up to his feet right into a kick to the gut, PUNK CITY…NO! SIMON HOPS ONTO THE APRON AND REMINDS HIM OF HIS OBLIGATIONS! Zero pushes SeeSaw away and angrily slams himself backwards into the canvas. SeeSaw doesn’t know what to make of it but dives on for the cover, hooking the leg…. ONE…. TWO…. THREE! IT’S OVER!
Seesaw picks up a mammoth win over the world champion here and Simon definitely got what he wanted.
We open on a hillside. The flowing grass of a meadow. Here, Chip Montana’s grinning face comes into view.
[ Chip Montana ] “G’day mates! I’m Chip Montana, and I’m grabbing nature by the balls!”
He motions towards the hillside, kneeling down by what seems like a little hole dug into the hillside.
[ Chip Montana ] “The humble rabbit burrow. The natural habitat for these pesky blighters. They say that the rabbit foot is lucky. If my tracking skills are good, and of course they bloody are… I believe I’ve tracked that little bugger back to his little home.”
He motions, and a very unimpressed Kaine Knightlord comes into view.
[ Kaine Knightlord ] “I was called here for what I believed important dealings. Had I known those dealings were with you, I would not have bothered.”
[ Chip Montana ] “You owe me a rabbit, vampire. Now stop talking and start catching.”
Chip dips into his trusty rucksack, and pulls two sticks of dynamite. He goes to hand one to Knightlord, but stops and shakes his head, instead holding both for himself.
[ Chip Montana ] “Righto matey. Let’s see if we can’t get lucky.”
Montana kneels down and places a stick of dynamite into the rabbit burrow. One… Then two sticks find their way into the hole, before Chip steps back. He is about to light the wick when he is interrupted by a third voice.
[ Chronoa ] “You’re about as bright as you look, aren’t you?”
She steps up to Chip, stopping him from lighting the dynamite.
[ Chronoa ] “History tells of another who liked to play with dynamite. Boomers, he called them. Are you a fool too?”
Chronoa mutters under he breath before looking past Montana, to a confused looking Knightlord.
[ Chronoa ] “I seek information that you or your kindred may possess…”
But before she can utter another word, the spark of flame distracts her from the task at hand. Chip Montana, it seems, has dropped his lighter onto the fuse of the dynamite.
[ Chip Montana ] “Whoopsee daisy.”
The Three look at each other for a moment before all three dive out of the way. Seconds later… BOOM! Dirt, grass and shrapnel fill the air.
When it settles, the rabbit burrow is long gone. But with no sign of any rabbits at all.
Disheveled, Chronoa, Knightlord and Montana each pull themselves to their feet, both Knightlord and Chronoa staring daggers at Chip Montana.
[ Chip Montana ] “Struuuuth mate. Crafty little devil wasn’t even there!”
Chip busies himself with the remnants of the burrow, while Chronoa squares up to Knightlord.
[ Chronoa ] “Tell me what you know of Night City”
CORVUS vs. DEATHNOTE
The Shinigami or the Black Hand’s Blade: who will be creeping death tonight?
DING DING DING!!!
Tie up collar and elbow. Corvus quickly transitions into a side headlock but Deathnote counters into a SAITO SUPLEX!
Corvus sits up but is immediately throttled back to the mat with a thunderous kick to the chest!
Deathnote follows up with a swift elbow drop to Corvus’s sternum before transitioning into an ANACONDA CROSS! The Author of Death can’t quite lock in the submission as Corvus kicks him in the face and wiggles free from his clutches.
Both men to their feet and Deathnote topples Corvus with a leg sweep, following up with a stiff stomp to Corvus’s chest.
Corvus clutches his midsection as he rolls away from Deathnote, but the Shinigami is unrelenting.
Corvus must have had the wind knocked out of him because he looks to be frozen in place with his mouth agape!
Deathnote moves to the corner while Corvus attempts to recover. He taunts writing in the air as Corvus hobbles over on all fours, gasping for breath. Deathnote wants to end this match early! He sprints at Corvus—
STROKE OF THE PEN!!
BUT THE PUNT KICK MISSES!!
Before Deathnote could even white out his grammatical error, Corvus slides behind Deathnote—
LEAPING TIGER KICK TO THE BACK OF DEATHNOTE’S SKULL!!
Deathnote stumbles through the ropes to the outside and before he can regain his composure he’s met head on by the ninja assassin—
DEATHNOTE COLLAPSES AGAINST THE CROWD BARRIER AS THE CROWD POPS!!
The ref begins the ten count as Corvus looks to continue his assault on the barrier-hung Deathnote—
Corvus takes it to Deathnote—
COBRA STRIKE PUNCH TO THE FACE!
Deathnote is still leaned up against the crowd barrier—
Corvus follows up—
TIGER’S PAW PUNCH!!
Deathnote must surely be out cold after that haymaker!
But Deathnote is still up! He slowly turns his head back at Corvus, exuding a creepy, sadistic smile through his bloodshot eyes—
DEATHNOTE IS LAUGHING, BEGGING FOR MORE!!
Corvus looks to the crowd in disbelief…
Corvus rears back again—
IRON FIST PUNCH!!
DOWN GOES DEATHNOTE!!
Corvus picks up Deathnote and starts to whip him back towards the ring but decides to call an audible mid-whip—
DROP TOE HOLD!!
INTO THE SIDE OF THE RING APRON!!!
As Deathnote lifts his head up from the floor we see that he is busted WIDE open, his crimson mask beginning to flow down over his eyes.
Corvus swiftly rolls Deathnote back into the ring before the eight count and follows. Deathnote slowly moves to his knees, but Corvus keeps the pressure on him—
DEATHNOTE SIGNED THE MAT IN RED INK AFTER BEING DRIVEN FACE-FIRST WITH THE HURRICANRANA DRIVER BY THE HIDDEN BLADE!!
HAS DEATHNOTE’S FINAL CHAPTER BEEN WRITTEN??
EMPHATIC KICKOUT AT 2.999!!
DEATHNOTE SITS UP, AND IS LAUGHING RIGHT IN CORVUS’S FACE!!
As Deathnote taunts Corvus, the crowd begins a familiar chant at the Author of Death—
“YOU SICK FUCK!! YOU SICK FUCK!!”
IT WILL TAKE MORE THAN THAT TO END THIS STORY!!
Deathnote rises as Corvus peppers him with kicks to the back of the knees—
Each kick is jolting through Deathnote like a lightning strike, but Deathnote just laughs after each one and keeps getting back up!
THROAT THRUST UPPERCUT—
Deathnote jolts back…
Corvus is looking to complete the MURDER OF BLOWS!!
JUMPING KNEE STRIKE—
DEATHNOTE CATCHES HIM IN MID-AIR INTO A FIREMAN’S CARRY!!
HE WOBBLES A BIT—
HIS KNEE IS SHAKY, BUT HE STEADIES HIMSELF…
Corvus crumps into a heap as Deathnote drops to his knees, laughing and taunting Corvus with the head on a pillow motion. Cover—
NO! CORVUS GETS A SHOULDER UP!!
Deathnote grips Corvus by the nape of his black shirt and pulls him up..
KNEE TO THE INJURED MIDSECTION!
Deathnote doesn’t let go.
KNEE TO THE MIDSECTION AGAIN!!
Now Corvus is coughing up blood as Deathnote pulls him in tight and leans him back—
CAN DEATHNOTE TURN THE PAGE!?
NO! CORVUS USES HIS AGILITY TO COUNTER INTO A DESPERATION HEADSTAND—
Corvus wraps his legs around Deathnote’s head, and twists—
TEETH OF TIGER THROW TAKEDOWN!!
Corvus is reeling a bit as he bleeds internally, and Deathnote can barely see through his crimson mask now as both men begin to burn down to the fumes in their gas tanks…
BIG LARIAT BY DEATHNOTE!
CORVUS DUCKS IT!!
Deathnote continues his momentum into the ropes and rebounds to Corvus who leapfrogs him! Deathnote’s knee is wearing on him and he’s running the ropes at too frantic of a pace, and it’s too late for him to stop himself before he runs right into a—
THE FLASH KICK NEARLY TOOK DEATHNOTE’S HEAD OFF!! COVER—
DEATHNOTE GETS A SHOULDER UP!!
Corvus immediately spins behind Deathnote and in the blink of an eye the Black Hand wraps his noose right around Deathnote’s neck—
Deathnote is throwing his arms around in defiance, trying to loosen Corvus’s grip to no avail!
CORVUS WRENCHES IT IN TIGHTER!!
DEATHNOTE IS FADING!!
His arms go limp, and the ref goes to check on him, lifting his arm up…
DEATHNOTE GETS TO ONE KNEE—
Corvus is shaking his head!
DEATHNOTE SCREAMS IN AGONY AS HE EXTENDS HIS SORE KNEE, USING ALL HIS MIGHT TO STAND UP WITH CORVUS HANGING LIKE A SPIDER MONKEY ON HIS BACK—
AND HOBBLES BACK-FIRST INTO THE CORNER!!
Corvus releases the submission and Deathnote maneuvers him onto his shoulders again, but inverted this time…
DEATHNOTE DROPS HIM IN THE MIDDLE OF THE RING WITH A DESPERATION BURNING HAMMER!!
Corvus is out, but Deathnote isn’t covering.
He’s slowly climbing to the top rope!
Deathnote winces in pain as he stands up, momentarily hesitating before he blows the crowd a kiss from the top turnbuckle…
KISS OF DEATH—
NO! CORVUS ROLLS AWAY FROM THE DOUBLE STOMP!!
Deathnote’s hard landing puts stress on his knees, and as he turns back around to face Corvus he suddenly finds Corvus’s arms wrapped around his neck—
THE BLACK HAND’S BLADE!!!
RKO OUTTA NOWHERE!!!
THE BLACK HAND WROTE TONIGHT’S NARRATIVE!!
Even the Author of Death couldn’t see the assassin come out of the shadows, and Corvus defeats his former tag team partner tonight!
We’re back stage in OSW where we see Lucy entering her locker room. There is a folder on her seat with “From Kaine” on it. Lucy groans at the site of his name.
[ Lucy Serephina ] “What game are you playing now?”
Lucy grabs the folder and opens it up, several photos sliding out. She looks at them and a look of recognition is on her face.
[ Lucy Serephina ] “It’s… It’s him!”
The photo shows her brother, Lucien, talking with Impaler. These photos are from surveillance, but they are far from recent. She continues filtering through, having a hard time telling when or where the photos were taken. But Impaler is clearly there, and Legion can be seen handing something off to the Brother Angel.
[ Lucy Serephina ] “What the fuck did you get into, Lucien?”
From behind her she hears a familiar voice. The haunting voice of the Legion himself.
[ The Impaler ] “He knew he was being followed. He wanted away from the world you were in, and he came to me before that fateful night to try and get away. He had heard of our story, and wanted help leaving.”
[ Lucy Serephina ] “You don’t what you’re talking about. But if you don’t tell me where you hid him, I swear I will tear that mask off your face and feed it to you.”
Impaler smirks at the threat, unconcerned.
[ The Impaler ] “You can threaten us all you’d like. Your kind has tried before over the years. I never knew where your brother went. I was just helping a lost soul find peace.”
[ Lucy Serephina ] “YOU FUCKER!”
Lucy lunges at the Dread Pirate but the lights start to flicker which brings her to a pause. Impaler makes his way to the door after his little show of power.
[ The Impaler ] “I’d retract those claws if I were you. You want your lost brother… What if he doesn’t wish to be found?”
Impaler walks out as Lucy sits for a moment to ponder what was just said. After a few moments, she storms out but doesn’t find the Impaler anywhere.
Many Hours Later.
We’re in the lobby of a gritty apartment building, somewhere in the heart of New York City. Michaela Lane and Tank Kersh are at the bottom of a stairwell, preparing to go up. They’re in hot debate.
[ Michaela Lane ] “You should go. If he goes on a bender, he’s impossible.”
[ Tank Kersh ] “Nah, he always responds better to you.”
They both sigh and decide to go together, walking up the stairs and down the hallway towards his door.
However, once they arrive, everything is not as it should be.
The door is ajar.
Kersh looks at Lane, who carefully pushes the door aside.
What they find is nothing short of shocking.
There’s blood everywhere; up the walls, on the ceiling and across furniture.
[ Tank Kersh ] “Carefully…”
Tank suggests as they enter the room. Slowly but surely, they step inside the apartment, finally revealing Jay Jeckel.
His body is brutalized – cut and torn to shreds. The bite and scratch marks have ripped him damn near in two as his separated limbs and body are strewn across the apartment.
Michaela immediately turns to face Tank who takes her into his arms; only there’s footsteps. He quickly shields her, pushing her behind him – ready to fight whatever comes next.
Just then, down the hall from the bedroom walks Deathnote.
[ Michaela Lane ] “Who the fuck are you?”
However, he’s not alone.
Corvus soon joins him.
[ Tank Kersh ] “You fucking cunt!”
[ Corvus ] “Shit!”
The Crow throws down a smoke bomb that provides both he and Deathnote enough cover to escape, and they do. As the smoke clears, Tank and Michaela find themselves rising from the floor with a cough and sputter to find both Deathnote and Corvus gone.
[ Michaela Lane ] “We have to tell Sigil.”