Dying with Dignity
There’s something poetic about a quick death. A flash of pain, a moment of anguish and then it’s all over. Life extinguished at a single click of the fingers.
But slowly fading away is like a living nightmare. Watching the moments pass, knowing you’re going to die and there’s not a damn thing you can do about it.
I remember lying there in the hospital bed, a forest of tubes covering me, barely able to breath if not for the machine pumping air through my lungs as every moment felt like absolute agony.
My body slowly withering away, my mind slipping as seconds faded into hours as I was trapped in a deep, oppressing fog like dream where nothing seemed real.
Cancer’s a bitch.
But the worst part is how it kills those you’re forced to leave behind. And everything you take away from them when you pass.
Every memory, every moment you were meant to share, all lost in the blink of an eye because some dipshit wrote the bad end in your card of fate.
Your cells slowly fading away as your own body considers them a virus to expunge is a torture worse then anyone can describe but it was heaven.
Compared to promising my daughter I’d always be there and then having to look her in the eyes and tell her I was a fucking liar.
I swore to the heavens above that I’d sell my goddamn soul to survive, to spare them from the agony I knew was coming.
And even now, I wish I’d just died with dignity because the alternative was far worse.
Our entire reality eroded away as the man I loved became a fucking monster and everything I cared about crumpled into dust.
And you wonder why I despise you Gable. Because my choice was taken away from me.
But you do the vile, destructive things you do of your own volition.
I get that you’re terrified of death Gable, I get that whatever Danvers did to you carved a scar down your soul that will never heal.
Yet everything you have done since donning that mask has been purest evil.
You demean the weak, vilify the innocent and walk the same path as the monsters you used to fight against.
And the worst of them all, the one true ally you have left is begging for you to see the light even if it kills him.
Because next you see Israel, look him in the eyes and see the desperation bleeding from them. Because even after everything you have done
He’d run into the abyss to give you one more day.
If I had the chance, I’d go back, die peacefully with those I loved and fade away knowing that a piece of me would always be them.
So at Red Snow, give Israel the peace of mind you owe him and walk calmly into the night
Because the hope he wants to give you he won’t survive. And Grimwolf may truly care for you.
But you sink that low Cael and even Isaac was too good for you.