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Between demons and PTSD

Between demons and PTSD

My PTSD haunts me like a demon.

I can’t escape it and once I thought I have, it comes back like a nightmare.

Hearing my screams of fear and pain, seeing my sire’s face, the smell of blood, wondering where my twin brother is at. Then the hunger kicking in, it burning my soul.

That night will never leave me.

Having to relive it in my dreams is a fate that I don’t wish on anyone. My siring was against my will and it has caused damaging effects that demons love to play on.

Hearing them whisper around, talking bad about me, you’d mistake me for a Malkivian, a vampire clan whose curse is mental illness.

On the horizon I have another battle with a different breed of demon.

These demons though, come in a form of a host that’s 6’8 and 295 pounds. Their host destroyed Night City and is not haunting it, holding my brother hostage. That alone causes my PTSD to bring me back to that night in Russia.

Then again, the demons are holding you hostage too aren’t they?

They just are using you and preying on you, all in one mask which could be thrown away but they won’t allow you to take it off; they want you as a host and puppet.

Legion, they are many and I maybe a single Tremere but I like these odds. I’m an underdog, I get that but I do have a bite to my bark.

Knowing I’m facing Legion, I couldn’t help myself but to try and do some research.

Legion, in the bible a demon or group of demons, particularly those in two of three versions of the exorcism of the Gerasene demoniac, an account in the New Testament of an incident in which Jesus performs an exorcism.

If you look at Mark 5:1-20 and you see Legion being a coward, begging to live in pigs because of their fear of Jesus; God’s son.

Now while I’m not Vayikra, one bible passage fits how I feel towards this…

Psalm 23:4 says, Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil: for thou art with me; thy rod and thy staff they comfort me.

But instead it’s more like, “Yet, I walk through the valley of the legion, I will fear no demon because they fear me instead, knowing that I will murder and exorcise every single one of them.”

Impaler, you’re just another one of those demons I have to conquer. So at Between Fuck and You, I’ll be the woman you’ve been waiting for. Call me the woman of your dreams, because I’m going to be your own personal exorcist. And I’m going to free you of your demons when I conquer you.

Because between you and me, you’re nothing compared to my PTSD.

And I don’t give a god damn if you are a never ending cycle like those haunting memories, because I won’t stop…

Until I get Lucien back.