In a world where the climb is all there is, some get to the top climbing rung by rung. Others choose to climb wrong by wrong.
My mother unfortunately was the latter.
She was proud of it too.
You see most people in her position in society would try to be discreet about what they did for money.
They would call themselves an escort or a companion. They would find their clients in sneaky ways. All their work would be done in the shadows.
Not Madame Balenciaga, no mommie dearest labeled herself the priestess of prostitution, after all she brought more men to her knees than any church could.
She was so proud of it, she didn’t hide in the shadows, she put neon lights on our house and when that familiar doorbell rang, I had to run to my room and be as quiet as possible.
Proud of her profession, me not so much. After all, reminding the men who use you that you’re a human being isn’t good for business.
I digress, at the height of her fame, she ran with her nickname and created the Gospel of Beauty, she proclaimed it would be religion for the corners the street preachers avoided.
Advice for other women of the night, she had words that might help an adult not an impressionable young girl.
Reading words like “Beauty is only skin deep. As long as you’re beautiful, a man will want to put his skin deep inside you.” made me feel disgusted.
These words came from the woman who taught me how to use foundation instead of giving me a proper childhood as a foundation to stand on.
Another gem was “You don’t have to believe you’re beautiful as long as the client does.” Couple that with words of wisdom like “Size does matter especially when we’re talking about wallets” and you have the recipe for a broken girl who needed to come up with her own way to live.
That’s what led to me finding beauty in everything and creating dresses that made me feel like I had a purpose that didn’t involve taking my clothes off. It was climbing a ladder the right way or becoming the princess of prostitution she wanted me to be.
I think I was the only child who disappointed her mother by not sleeping with strangers.
However, by disappointing her, I impressed the world.
You see, Grimskull, the earliest preachers in our lives are our parents and I climbed to the top rejecting everything mine taught me.
I have no problem rejecting your words and disappointing another preacher made for the streets.
You see if she taught me one thing, it was using men to get to where I need to go. The difference is I don’t fuck them after I get what I want.
There’s no happy endings when you go for this Balenciaga.
The only thing that will be exposed after our nighttime encounter is that skull of yours.
So shut up and save your sermons, Grimskull, as my mom likes to say, a man’s mouth is really only good for one thing.
Getting me to the apex…
of a ladder.